I Am Unapologetically Human… A Note to Linda Kelsey (The “Fattist” DailyMail Writer)

The average newborn is 7.5 pounds… I came into the world at 10 pounds, so you might say I’ve been a Plus Size Princess since the beginning. I was eight when I began feeling bigger than the other girls. I was 12 when my pediatrician wrinkled her nose and bluntly told my mother that I was fat.

I’ve been dieting, losing weight… and gaining more back ever since.

I never saw my weight as part of my identity because being a big girl was always supposed to be a temporary thing. The plan was to do all of the things that skinny girls do: Moderation! Self Control! Eat Less, Move More! and then a skinny body would be mine too.

But here’s the thing, exercise and eating well has enabled me to have a clean bill of health, but it has yet to make ME skinny. Maybe my 10 pound birth weight was the spoiler alert I was destined to be plus size. Maybe its my Poly Cycstic Ovarian Syndrome that keeps me from being small… who knows!

What I do know is that I have a choice. I can live my life miserable because of what the scale says or I can live an awesome life no matter what the scale says.

Today when I saw Linda Kelsey asking why young women are so unashamed about being fat in this article. I felt like she was writing directly to me. She told a story of seeing Plus Size Princesses in the airport heading out for vacation.

They sounded – and looked – happy and carefree. But what mesmerised me most about this jolly trio was not their conversation, but their appearance: they were size 18 apiece, at least.

Wait a minute… I’m at least a size 18 and when I’m headed out for vacation I too am carefree and happy! Ms. Kelsey, were you at JFK when I flew to Mexico??

Far from body hatred, what I witnessed was a let-it-all-hang-out faith in themselves and a don’t-give-a-damn attitude to their evident obesity.

 

Okay, you’re in the UK and I’m in NYC so maybe it wasn’t me you saw. But let me explain to you what you witnessed with those three plus size girls in the airport…

We live in a world where men feel comfortable walking up to women and screaming “lose some weight, fat ass!”. We live in a society where girls on a weight loss journey stop jogging in public because people heckle them from their cars. We are brought up with messaging that our value as a person is based on our body type and the bigger you are the less value you have.

Then to top it all off we have “unappologetically fattist” people like you who think being overweight “should be as unacceptable as smoking”. Smoking is not allowed in the work place, restaurants, and a good chunk of public spaces… I’m trying to figure out if that’s what you’re suggesting should be done about us “fatties”.

So, Linda what you interpreted as a “don’t-give-a-damn” attitude in those girls dressing as they wanted with no concern for your opinion was actually them being vulnerable, being themselves and being comfortable with their bodies– a tough thing for any woman to do at any size… but seeing big girls do it? In my opinion, you witnessed a miracle.

Those girls have heard you and your fat-phoboc friends loud and clear their whole lives… they know you can’t stand anyone who isn’t thin. They know that the presence of their large bodies made you uncomfortable and yet they were still able to get out of bed, dress as they wanted and live… an amazing feat, I’d say!

Big girls know that we’re big and most of us are working on our health. I started the #PSPfit online fitness community because big girls DO work out and eat healthy. If being skinny is in the future for any of us fatties it wont happen overnight (heck, I’ve lost 55 pounds and I’m still fat) but in the meantime as WE figure out whats best for OUR bodies I think we should be allowed to just have a good day. I think we should be allowed to love our bodies currently as we work towards being our best selves. We should be allowed to smile, laugh, dance, go on dates and break free from the body policing many of us have been dealing with since childhood.

Related: Should I tell My Plus Size Daughter to Lose Weight?

Linda, listen to me (listen to me Linda!)– You’re unapologetically fattist and I am unapologetically human. All humans have things they’re working through. I’m working through my weight, which means my struggles are on display for the world to see and critique in articles online. You have the luxury of keeping your struggles hidden, but I imagine that you don’t spend every moment of every day crying and hiding because of them, so please don’t expect me to do that. I don’t know what your struggles are, but if I did I would be compassionate.

Some say we judge others harshly in the areas where we are insecure. Sometimes I wonder if its not my fat body that people hate, but the happiness, joy and full life I have in spite of it.

No apology needed, Linda… No apology needed.

I Am Unapologetically Human... A Note to Linda Kelsey PlusSizePrincess.com

223 thoughts on “I Am Unapologetically Human… A Note to Linda Kelsey (The “Fattist” DailyMail Writer)”

  1. Thank you for this. I can’t wait for the day that we are all accepted as we are. Curvy, skinny, Black, white and everything in between. I hope all the Lindas of the world read this and understand….I’m not here for you. Im here for me and I’m living for me. Thanks again for writing this… so eloquent.

  2. Thank you for this. I can’t wait for the day that we are all accepted as we are. Curvy, skinny, Black, white and everything in between. I hope all the Lindas of the world read this and understand….I’m not here for you. Im here for me and I’m living for me. Thanks again for writing this… so eloquent.

  3. Well you did it again, I have goosebumps and am ferociously nodding my head in approval. I may have let out a “whoop” or two as well.
    Leading from a place of love, commitment, and nutritional know how will bring beautiful healthy shifts. Leading from a place of shame, disgust, and humiliation will only lead to emptiness. Ms. Kelsey has her own emptiness to contend with.

  4. abrapappa@gmail.com

    Well you did it again, I have goosebumps and am ferociously nodding my head in approval. I may have let out a “whoop” or two as well.Leading from a place of love, commitment, and nutritional know how will bring beautiful healthy shifts. Leading from a place of shame, disgust, and humiliation will only lead to emptiness. Ms. Kelsey has her own emptiness to contend with.

  5. You hit the nail on the head Cece! This is wonderful. And yes, it’s the happiness they can’t fathom. ‘Look how happy those girls seem….BUT THEY’RE FAT how can they be happy??’ Bitch don’t kill my vibe! When I see girls larger than I am rocking those crop tops, I don’t feel disgust. I feel slightly envious in how comfortable they are in their own skin. I see curvy burlesque dancers and think ‘shit, I look like that why can’t I be that confident?!’ Some of us deal in love and some of us deal in hate. We should just be thankful that we deal in a way that makes people like us. 🙂

  6. nicolemnesbitt@gmail.com

    You hit the nail on the head Cece! This is wonderful. And yes, it’s the happiness they can’t fathom. ‘Look how happy those girls seem….BUT THEY’RE FAT how can they be happy??’ Bitch don’t kill my vibe! When I see girls larger than I am rocking those crop tops, I don’t feel disgust. I feel slightly envious in how comfortable they are in their own skin. I see curvy burlesque dancers and think ‘shit, I look like that why can’t I be that confident?!’ Some of us deal in love and some of us deal in hate. We should just be thankful that we deal in a way that makes people like us. 🙂

  7. No apologizes here!! Confidence does not see size. Don’t let my happiness steal your joy while your disillusion of what you think I SHOULD be fill your mind to point you want to put it down on paper and publish it!. My mother always said it’s better to be thought a fool, than to open you mouth and remove all doubt!

  8. No apologizes here!! Confidence does not see size. Don’t let my happiness steal your joy while your disillusion of what you think I SHOULD be fill your mind to point you want to put it down on paper and publish it!. My mother always said it’s better to be thought a fool, than to open you mouth and remove all doubt!

  9. I read the article about an hour ago and am simply disgusted by her attitude. As someone in recovery from an eating disorder, I cannot believe how insignificant she seems to believe EDs are. She concedes that yes ‘eating disorders can kill’ but then quickly moves on to list every possible known illness ever associated with obesity. Yes my dear, eating disorders do kill. In fact it is the highest cause of death of people between the ages of 15 and 25; they are 12 times more likely to kill than any other cause of death for people of that age, yes including car accidents. When you restrict your intake your body will get the energy it needs from just about anywhere which means your heart and other vital organs, your bones, teeth, and a whole host of other things you really need to stay intact. this leads to osteoporosis, stress fractures, electrolyte imbalances, heart failure…need I go on?
    There has also been a lot of research lately that proves obesity is NOT a causal factor of many disease states as it has so often thought to be. For example, 48% of patients with diabetes are not obese [K. Slynkova et al, 2006]. The fact that most research into such topics is funded by pharmaceutical companies also makes me question their validity; like most things these days, health, unfortunately, is a business. Most of the article was filled with condescending, outdated beliefs of how being fat immediately causes a whole host of illness and diseases and we should all be ashamed of ourselves. If she cannot see the many young women I see being ravaged by mental illnesses and body image issues then I don’t know where she is looking because I sure can. I see far too many people daily over-exercising and under-fueling and it’s a slippery slope. What this woman saw was a refreshing sight of young girls being comfortable in their skin and happily anticipating a holiday. I’m not appalled by them – I’m completely envious. I would love to be that happy with my body, and hope to some day be as such. People like her need to seriously back off and mind their own damn business. Slim, fat, black, white, muslim, christian, mormon, whatever..they’re all just labels. I once read ‘You are not fat, you have fat. You have fingernails also, but this does not mean you are fingernails.’ how true indeed. (apologies for the long post, rant over now!)

    1. Not sure where you get your statistics from or what country they’re for. I got #1 Land transport accidents, #2 Suicide, #3 Accidental poisoning, #4 Event of undetermined intent, #5 Assault, for age 15-24 in Australia 2009-11. http://www.aihw.gov.au/deaths/causes-of-death/

      Also, i feel you should do a bit more research into restriction and fasting.

      Further more: i don’t think you read that article very well, not only does it not distinguish between type 1 and type 2 Diabetes mellitus, but it actually goes on to say “The relationship between an increased BMI and DM has been well established…Our data, similarly, showed that subjects with BMIs ≥ 30 had a fourfold higher prevalence of DM than subjects with BMIs of 20 to 24.”

    2. I totally agree and people (including medical professionals) just don’t want to shift their way of thinking and accept that some of their long-held beliefs are actually not true. This article also blows to smithereens that falsely held belief that, for those who want it, long term weight loss is even achievable http://www.cbc.ca/news/health/obesity-research-confirms-long-term-weight-loss-almost-impossible-1.2663585

      People like her not only need to back off, they need to realise the damage they are doing to people with fragile self-esteem.

        1. I don’t need the approval of a bigot to make my facts more credible. The people involved in the research are named… look it up for yourself. Oh hang on you won’t do that as it would prove some of your “medical assumptions” to be just that … assumptions.

          1. I found the study, after some digging, that seem the most likely.

            It’s by a psychologist, not a medical doctor.
            http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/amp/62/3/220/ (journal)
            http://motivatedandfit.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/Diets_dont_work.pdf (full paper)

            The review (not it’s own study there is no sign of her 20-year-run eating lab) was designed to advise Medicare in obesity treatment.

            It reviews only seven previous studies (for comparison, most reviews cover at least 20 other studies, sometimes thousands). It does include other studies in its calculations, but does not review them. (table on page 225)

            It claims that the studies where participants reported their own weights are void.

            It claims that those that include exercise should be discounted.

            Then it concludes that 2/3 failed so no-one should ever try.

            So lets sum-up:
            Touchy-feely lady looks at a bunch of studies not in her field. Finds a bunch of studies where people had looked at small-and-large-scale controlled weight loss. Cherry-picks studies to suit her purpose. Then makes a broad-stroke claim.

            I’d also like to point out that the paper that followed directly after is titled “Effective obesity treatments” http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/amp/62/3/234/

            I read your “science”, I even did your research for you.

            The LEAST you could do is read over the studies i pointed out.

          2. Your closed-mindedness does not even deserve an intelligent response so I won’t bother with you any further. You are not interested in being made aware of current studies and progressions in the medical world … the paradigm is shifting and thankfully a lot of doctors are more open-minded than you. Your disdain for both larger people and for psychologists is evident in what you have written above and your inability to accept that you can be fat and fit makes you even more close-minded. I guess I just have to accept there are people who have their prejudices and who are not interested in having their long-held beliefs challenged in any way.

          3. My dear, you are in fact, displaying the exact definition of close-mindedness whilst i did the exact opposite.
            You refuse to hear any side other than your own.
            I actually read what you posted and gave my opinion with evidence to support it.
            At no point have i said anything negative about fat people, I am just trying to erase the notion that you can be fat and still be healthy. It is a lie.
            You know nothing about me, how can you pre-judge me this way? Perhaps you should google “bigotry”.

          4. study 1:
            Looked at heart health and compared subjects with and without cardiac abnormalities.
            It pretty much just says that an increase in BMI is unlikely to change pre-existing heart conditions.

            study 2:
            looks at metabolic health in high-BMI women.
            It concludes that those with less visceral fat are at a lower risk of cardiovascular disease.

            study 3:
            Looks at the different definitions of Metabolicly Healthy Obesity (MHO).
            Concludes that ” MHO prevalence varies considerably according to the criteria used”.

            the 4th piece was just a news article that referenced the above papers.

          5. Look just admit you are not going to change your views and are prejudiced towards large people.

            I give up … I don’t need extra bigots in my life and you are just not interested in looking at the fact that medical views are changing in spite of your protestations to the contrary. The fact you couldn’t even recognize the analogous properties of the reference I made earlier to green-eyes shows I am not the one who is uneducated. Maybe you aren’t either … but if you are educated you are being deliberately provocative. CeCe has asked us to keep it civil so I am bowing out and just having to accept some people are not interested in learning of new developments or accepting the merits in other views. It is interesting to note that the comment of mine that you erroneously jumped on initially was “The problem with that line of thinking is it is based on an incorrect
            assumption that weight is a causal factor to all that ails us” and that remains true. You chose to read it through biased glasses and not as the true comment that it is. Someone’s weight does not affect the fact they may get a cold, they may have fibromyalgia, they may have a hernia etc as these are just three of a multitude of conditions that people other than large people also get … and that was my initial point. The fact that it branched off in the direction it did just highlighted for me a deeply entrenched bias on your behalf. At the end of the day it is NONE of your business what a person weighs … you don’t know their story and they deserve to be treated with the same respect as anyone one else you encounter.
            Compassion and kindness are what everyone, irrespective of their size, needs and that is why I am not responding to anymore of your comments.

          6. Before i pitied you. Now i’m just disgusted. You know nothing about me yet you insist on calling me a “bigot”.
            You refuse to hear any side other than your own. You spit bile and ridicule like you have more rights than anyone else.
            (the green eyes thing… WTF? that’s not even passable as science)
            I am educated. I know that doctors only humor the idea of HEAS to get people to be more conscious of their health. I know that it is damaging to our country (yes, i’m Australian). And i know that you will never be willing to learn.
            I hope that if we ever cross paths, i’m not left at your mercy, because i doubt i would receive any.

          7. Wow you are one nasty person Ema! I think she explained herself really well and I sure got what she was saying. Don’t think she wanted your pity either.

            Caryn you have my admiration for trying as long as you did girl. Bless her heart she just didn’t seem to get it, did she?

          8. What am i supposed to “get”?
            That feelings get hurt when facts are laid out?
            That it’s ok to be ignorant of science, just so long as you’re happy about it?
            That you can call me whatever name you want, but refuse to look at anything from a different side.

          9. And why are you using quotation marks? I’m not making assumptions. I’m using science to question your assumptions.

  10. I read the article about an hour ago and am simply disgusted by her attitude. As someone in recovery from an eating disorder, I cannot believe how insignificant she seems to believe EDs are. She concedes that yes ‘eating disorders can kill’ but then quickly moves on to list every possible known illness ever associated with obesity. Yes my dear, eating disorders do kill. In fact it is the highest cause of death of people between the ages of 15 and 25; they are 12 times more likely to kill than any other cause of death for people of that age, yes including car accidents. When you restrict your intake your body will get the energy it needs from just about anywhere which means your heart and other vital organs, your bones, teeth, and a whole host of other things you really need to stay intact. this leads to osteoporosis, stress fractures, electrolyte imbalances, heart failure…need I go on?There has also been a lot of research lately that proves obesity is NOT a causal factor of many disease states as it has so often thought to be. For example, 48% of patients with diabetes are not obese [K. Slynkova et al, 2006]. The fact that most research into such topics is funded by pharmaceutical companies also makes me question their validity; like most things these days, health, unfortunately, is a business. Most of the article was filled with condescending, outdated beliefs of how being fat immediately causes a whole host of illness and diseases and we should all be ashamed of ourselves. If she cannot see the many young women I see being ravaged by mental illnesses and body image issues then I don’t know where she is looking because I sure can. I see far too many people daily over-exercising and under-fueling and it’s a slippery slope. What this woman saw was a refreshing sight of young girls being comfortable in their skin and happily anticipating a holiday. I’m not appalled by them – I’m completely envious. I would love to be that happy with my body, and hope to some day be as such. People like her need to seriously back off and mind their own damn business. Slim, fat, black, white, muslim, christian, mormon, whatever..they’re all just labels. I once read ‘You are not fat, you have fat. You have fingernails also, but this does not mean you are fingernails.’ how true indeed. (apologies for the long post, rant over now!)

    1. jasdoll16@gmail.com

      Not sure where you get your statistics from or what country they’re for. I got #1 Land transport accidents, #2 Suicide, #3 Accidental poisoning, #4 Event of undetermined intent, #5 Assault, for age 15-24 in Australia 2009-11. http://www.aihw.gov.au/deaths/causes-of-death/
      Also, i feel you should do a bit more research into restriction and fasting.

      Further more: i don’t think you read that article very well, not only does it not distinguish between type 1 and type 2 Diabetes mellitus, but it actually goes on to say “The relationship between an increased BMI and DM has been well established…Our data, similarly, showed that subjects with BMIs ≥ 30 had a fourfold higher prevalence of DM than subjects with BMIs of 20 to 24.”

    2. chenushk@aapt.net.au

      I totally agree and people (including medical professionals) just don’t want to shift their way of thinking and accept that some of their long-held beliefs are actually not true. This article also blows to smithereens that falsely held belief that, for those who want it, long term weight loss is even achievable http://www.cbc.ca/news/health/obesity-research-confirms-long-term-weight-loss-almost-impossible-1.2663585
      People like her not only need to back off, they need to realise the damage they are doing to people with fragile self-esteem.

        1. chenushk@aapt.net.au

          I don’t need the approval of a bigot to make my facts more credible. The people involved in the research are named… look it up for yourself. Oh hang on you won’t do that as it would prove some of your “medical assumptions” to be just that … assumptions.

          1. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            I found the study, after some digging, that seem the most likely.
            It’s by a psychologist, not a medical doctor.
            http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/amp/62/3/220/ (journal)
            http://motivatedandfit.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/Diets_dont_work.pdf (full paper)

            The review (not it’s own study there is no sign of her 20-year-run eating lab) was designed to advise Medicare in obesity treatment.

            It reviews only seven previous studies (for comparison, most reviews cover at least 20 other studies, sometimes thousands). It does include other studies in its calculations, but does not review them. (table on page 225)

            It claims that the studies where participants reported their own weights are void.

            It claims that those that include exercise should be discounted.

            Then it concludes that 2/3 failed so no-one should ever try.

            So lets sum-up:
            Touchy-feely lady looks at a bunch of studies not in her field. Finds a bunch of studies where people had looked at small-and-large-scale controlled weight loss. Cherry-picks studies to suit her purpose. Then makes a broad-stroke claim.

            I’d also like to point out that the paper that followed directly after is titled “Effective obesity treatments” http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/amp/62/3/234/

            I read your “science”, I even did your research for you.

            The LEAST you could do is read over the studies i pointed out.

          2. chenushk@aapt.net.au

            Your closed-mindedness does not even deserve an intelligent response so I won’t bother with you any further. You are not interested in being made aware of current studies and progressions in the medical world … the paradigm is shifting and thankfully a lot of doctors are more open-minded than you. Your disdain for both larger people and for psychologists is evident in what you have written above and your inability to accept that you can be fat and fit makes you even more close-minded. I guess I just have to accept there are people who have their prejudices and who are not interested in having their long-held beliefs challenged in any way.

          3. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            My dear, you are in fact, displaying the exact definition of close-mindedness whilst i did the exact opposite.You refuse to hear any side other than your own.
            I actually read what you posted and gave my opinion with evidence to support it.
            At no point have i said anything negative about fat people, I am just trying to erase the notion that you can be fat and still be healthy. It is a lie.
            You know nothing about me, how can you pre-judge me this way? Perhaps you should google “bigotry”.

          4. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            study 1:Looked at heart health and compared subjects with and without cardiac abnormalities.
            It pretty much just says that an increase in BMI is unlikely to change pre-existing heart conditions.

            study 2:
            looks at metabolic health in high-BMI women.
            It concludes that those with less visceral fat are at a lower risk of cardiovascular disease.

            study 3:
            Looks at the different definitions of Metabolicly Healthy Obesity (MHO).
            Concludes that ” MHO prevalence varies considerably according to the criteria used”.

            the 4th piece was just a news article that referenced the above papers.

          5. chenushk@aapt.net.au

            Look just admit you are not going to change your views and are prejudiced towards large people.
            I give up … I don’t need extra bigots in my life and you are just not interested in looking at the fact that medical views are changing in spite of your protestations to the contrary. The fact you couldn’t even recognize the analogous properties of the reference I made earlier to green-eyes shows I am not the one who is uneducated. Maybe you aren’t either … but if you are educated you are being deliberately provocative. CeCe has asked us to keep it civil so I am bowing out and just having to accept some people are not interested in learning of new developments or accepting the merits in other views. It is interesting to note that the comment of mine that you erroneously jumped on initially was “The problem with that line of thinking is it is based on an incorrect
            assumption that weight is a causal factor to all that ails us” and that remains true. You chose to read it through biased glasses and not as the true comment that it is. Someone’s weight does not affect the fact they may get a cold, they may have fibromyalgia, they may have a hernia etc as these are just three of a multitude of conditions that people other than large people also get … and that was my initial point. The fact that it branched off in the direction it did just highlighted for me a deeply entrenched bias on your behalf. At the end of the day it is NONE of your business what a person weighs … you don’t know their story and they deserve to be treated with the same respect as anyone one else you encounter.
            Compassion and kindness are what everyone, irrespective of their size, needs and that is why I am not responding to anymore of your comments.

          6. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            Before i pitied you. Now i’m just disgusted. You know nothing about me yet you insist on calling me a “bigot”.You refuse to hear any side other than your own. You spit bile and ridicule like you have more rights than anyone else.
            (the green eyes thing… WTF? that’s not even passable as science)
            I am educated. I know that doctors only humor the idea of HEAS to get people to be more conscious of their health. I know that it is damaging to our country (yes, i’m Australian). And i know that you will never be willing to learn.
            I hope that if we ever cross paths, i’m not left at your mercy, because i doubt i would receive any.

          7. chenushk@gmail.com

            Wow you are one nasty person Ema! I think she explained herself really well and I sure got what she was saying. Don’t think she wanted your pity either.
            Caryn you have my admiration for trying as long as you did girl. Bless her heart she just didn’t seem to get it, did she?

          8. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            What am i supposed to “get”?That feelings get hurt when facts are laid out?
            That it’s ok to be ignorant of science, just so long as you’re happy about it?
            That you can call me whatever name you want, but refuse to look at anything from a different side.

          9. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            And why are you using quotation marks? I’m not making assumptions. I’m using science to question your assumptions.

  11. God forbid we be fat AND happy. Whatever… Anyhoo, Thanks for this post! I try every day to care a little less what the world thinks I should be/look like. All this positivity you put out there is amazing!

  12. randi.lynn2810@gmail.com

    God forbid we be fat AND happy. Whatever… Anyhoo, Thanks for this post! I try every day to care a little less what the world thinks I should be/look like. All this positivity you put out there is amazing!

  13. This is SO spot on! That article was hateful, judgmental and just plain ignorant. As you said, I’m sure she has issues that she’s dealing with that she can hide. How dare she take a high brow view of other people. Even more disheartening are the comments on the article. All of the highest rated comments are from people who agree with her and echo her sentiment. The difference is that they would never have the guts to write and post such bull and sign their name to it.

  14. jameka_lewis@hotmail.com

    This is SO spot on! That article was hateful, judgmental and just plain ignorant. As you said, I’m sure she has issues that she’s dealing with that she can hide. How dare she take a high brow view of other people. Even more disheartening are the comments on the article. All of the highest rated comments are from people who agree with her and echo her sentiment. The difference is that they would never have the guts to write and post such bull and sign their name to it.

  15. Janeilla Thomas John

    Reading this and dancing. I read it today and almost tossed my phone. The nerve of this old hag. Bye girl,big girls are winning. I to am on a health journey and I can say I am in the 200’s and I am more fit than my skinny/smaller friends.

  16. tjaneilla@yahoo.com

    Reading this and dancing. I read it today and almost tossed my phone. The nerve of this old hag. Bye girl,big girls are winning. I to am on a health journey and I can say I am in the 200’s and I am more fit than my skinny/smaller friends.

  17. I love this so much “You have the luxury of keeping your struggles hidden, but I imagine that
    you don’t spend every moment of every day crying and hiding because of
    them, so please don’t expect me to do that. I don’t know what your
    struggles are, but if I did I would be compassionate.” Wow, CeCe, you are awesome!

  18. lypscratch@gmail.com

    I love this so much “You have the luxury of keeping your struggles hidden, but I imagine that you don’t spend every moment of every day crying and hiding because of
    them, so please don’t expect me to do that. I don’t know what your
    struggles are, but if I did I would be compassionate.” Wow, CeCe, you are awesome!

  19. Yesterday, I read her article. Today, I am reading yours. Wish that I had read yours first because you are so gracious and kind. Yesterday, all I felt was anger and revulsion toward that author. Thanks for being the voice for many of us, and thanks for bringing a smile to my face with your parenthetical “Listen to me, Linda” reference.

  20. Yesterday, I read her article. Today, I am reading yours. Wish that I had read yours first because you are so gracious and kind. Yesterday, all I felt was anger and revulsion toward that author. Thanks for being the voice for many of us, and thanks for bringing a smile to my face with your parenthetical “Listen to me, Linda” reference.

  21. Well done Cece on a wonderful response. You are spot on! Something Marilyn Wann said in her book really helped me to understand why others can get so shitty about fat women being happy. She wrote,

    Perhaps these angry people don’t really believe that you can’t be fat and
    healthy. They just believe – deeply, self-righteously – that you cannot
    be fat and get away with it. The very idea of me, a fat chick, enjoying
    life, getting away with it, sends them into attack mode…

    …because what these [people] were really saying was…”I deny myself the
    pleasure of food every day, because I can’t stand the thought of being
    fat. How dare you not suffer as much as I do! How dare you eat a bite of
    something ‘sinful’ and not beat yourself up about it the way I do! How
    dare you be happier than I am! If a fat person can be healthy without
    starving herself and working out obsessively, if she can be happy
    without being thin, then I’ve suffered for nothing, and I can’t stand
    that thought. I can’t stand the thought of you.”

    They are trying desperately to put the uppity fat chick back in her place…

    The “health” argument is a big old smokescreen for our old friend: fat
    hatred. When people realise they can’t get away with expressing their
    prejudice against fat outright, they use the health argument instead,
    but the emotion behind their words is still hatred.

    Our culture currently believes that thin is good and fat is bad. This
    belief encourages the hatred of fat and the deification of thin. This
    belief is the basis for fat oppression and thin privilege. Now, not one
    person is responsible for this system of prejudice. But once you become
    aware of the system, it’s your choice, your responsibility, to choose
    how you will relate to it. You can reinforce it and try to benefit from
    it, or you can refuse to participate in it or live by its standards in
    any respect.

  22. Well done Cece on a wonderful response. You are spot on! Something Marilyn Wann said in her book really helped me to understand why others can get so shitty about fat women being happy. She wrote,
    Perhaps these angry people don’t really believe that you can’t be fat and
    healthy. They just believe – deeply, self-righteously – that you cannot
    be fat and get away with it. The very idea of me, a fat chick, enjoying
    life, getting away with it, sends them into attack mode…

    …because what these [people] were really saying was…”I deny myself the
    pleasure of food every day, because I can’t stand the thought of being
    fat. How dare you not suffer as much as I do! How dare you eat a bite of
    something ‘sinful’ and not beat yourself up about it the way I do! How
    dare you be happier than I am! If a fat person can be healthy without
    starving herself and working out obsessively, if she can be happy
    without being thin, then I’ve suffered for nothing, and I can’t stand
    that thought. I can’t stand the thought of you.”

    They are trying desperately to put the uppity fat chick back in her place…

    The “health” argument is a big old smokescreen for our old friend: fat
    hatred. When people realise they can’t get away with expressing their
    prejudice against fat outright, they use the health argument instead,
    but the emotion behind their words is still hatred.

    Our culture currently believes that thin is good and fat is bad. This
    belief encourages the hatred of fat and the deification of thin. This
    belief is the basis for fat oppression and thin privilege. Now, not one
    person is responsible for this system of prejudice. But once you become
    aware of the system, it’s your choice, your responsibility, to choose
    how you will relate to it. You can reinforce it and try to benefit from
    it, or you can refuse to participate in it or live by its standards in
    any respect.

  23. So very well written CeCe.. I read the article in the Daily Mail (nothing but a gossip mag anyway) with open mouth shock! How someone can be so single minded about people she does not know is beyond me, the old ‘dont judge a book by it’s cover’ rule should have been applied here. Linda Kelsey does not know those girls, she does not know their story, but by the way she wrote about them, they sounded so very comfortable in their own skin.. Being happy with your inner self is so much more important than how others perceive your outer self.

  24. So very well written CeCe.. I read the article in the Daily Mail (nothing but a gossip mag anyway) with open mouth shock! How someone can be so single minded about people she does not know is beyond me, the old ‘dont judge a book by it’s cover’ rule should have been applied here. Linda Kelsey does not know those girls, she does not know their story, but by the way she wrote about them, they sounded so very comfortable in their own skin.. Being happy with your inner self is so much more important than how others perceive your outer self.

  25. Lisa Dollins-Barriner

    WOOT! You got it in one! I am sooo sick and tired of the snobbery involved in this culture when it comes to those of us who are not the desired body type. Really? What difference does my size make in their lives?

  26. lbarriner@outlook.com

    WOOT! You got it in one! I am sooo sick and tired of the snobbery involved in this culture when it comes to those of us who are not the desired body type. Really? What difference does my size make in their lives?

  27. Isn’t it clear that Linda’s biggest struggle is being a huge asshole? I thought it was pretty apparent after reading her article.

  28. shelleygrasso@yahoo.com

    Isn’t it clear that Linda’s biggest struggle is being a huge asshole? I thought it was pretty apparent after reading her article.

  29. glorian.gray@gmail.com

    Love this, spot on. You are totally right of course. Some people choose to live in hate and judgement, such as the writer of that article. I feel for them a bit, to be honest. It mustn’t be nice inside a mind like that.

  30. mistyblue8570@hotmail.com

    … I get that having fat is unhealthy and some of us are selfconscious about it. Being PSP, you get reminded or lectured almost everyday what’s good for us by some people. I think that in this article, there was a lot of lack of tact shown. I think it is important in the society we live in to raise awareness, but yet she wrote this article clumsily. I’m selfconscious of how I look, I am going to college full time and I’m in my last sprint, and I will start again making exercise. I prepared myself for it mentally. Its not easy. Yes there is a question of motivation and willingness in that aspect but If I do it, it’s for my self-confidence and my health. Everybody has the right to have their opinion but we also forget how to rightfully choose our words in our everyday relationships and hurt some people with words… Whether you believe it or not, words can hurt. For myself, she gives me the motivation to push myself and prove her wrong!!!

  31. Guess what? I lost 120 pounds and I am still fat. I feel that being plus size is part of my identity. I am so proud of these young women today who are not ashamed of their bodies. I think it is worse to yo yo diet than to stay one size.

  32. borogirl54@yahoo.com

    Guess what? I lost 120 pounds and I am still fat. I feel that being plus size is part of my identity. I am so proud of these young women today who are not ashamed of their bodies. I think it is worse to yo yo diet than to stay one size.

  33. I’m very upset buy what was said by her. And you were spot on CeCe So sad ,why do people have to sit and worry about other peoples lives. Like they make a difference saying things as so. No im not trying to be thin. I exercise, run around and do yoga because I want not because I am on this crusade to be thin. I know that you have to eat cake and then keep half of it work the other half out lol. But again I know this feeling I moved to a state where they seem disgusted to see me in shorts, if I didn’t have the correct up bringing I would have a lot more to say. But im happy like those girls at the airport. I am so tired of being singled out like I did something to the world. Someone very immature sat and thought of this a long time ago.

  34. I’m very upset buy what was said by her. And you were spot on CeCe So sad ,why do people have to sit and worry about other peoples lives. Like they make a difference saying things as so. No im not trying to be thin. I exercise, run around and do yoga because I want not because I am on this crusade to be thin. I know that you have to eat cake and then keep half of it work the other half out lol. But again I know this feeling I moved to a state where they seem disgusted to see me in shorts, if I didn’t have the correct up bringing I would have a lot more to say. But im happy like those girls at the airport. I am so tired of being singled out like I did something to the world. Someone very immature sat and thought of this a long time ago.

  35. If you can’t lose weight for yourself, do it for the people around you.. your kids, your husband, etc. Stop making excuses for being obese. It’s not normal. It’s a problem that effects everyone–not just you. And it’s selfish to rationalize your fatness.

    1. Chef Demetra Overton

      I think this post is more than about losing weight or not. Its about not being miserable every second of every day because you’re fat. I’m working on my weight but I’m going to have a good time while I do it. Tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone, fat or thin,so I’m going to enjoy today and I hope you do as well.

  36. benkeller@mail.utexas.edu

    If you can’t lose weight for yourself, do it for the people around you.. your kids, your husband, etc. Stop making excuses for being obese. It’s not normal. It’s a problem that effects everyone–not just you. And it’s selfish to rationalize your fatness.

    1. chefoverton@sweetsavant.com

      I think this post is more than about losing weight or not. Its about not being miserable every second of every day because you’re fat. I’m working on my weight but I’m going to have a good time while I do it. Tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone, fat or thin,so I’m going to enjoy today and I hope you do as well.

  37. i agree with everything you said. I was in my early 20’s when I found an organization that help me realize that I should wait until I got thin to have a life – i needed to live my life NOW! And so long as I am healthy, my weight shouldn’t matter. Even Dr. Oz was treated different when he was in a fat suit – he even said himself that he was made to feel bad about himself by the looks and comments by people.

  38. csyouwin@yahoo.com

    i agree with everything you said. I was in my early 20’s when I found an organization that help me realize that I should wait until I got thin to have a life – i needed to live my life NOW! And so long as I am healthy, my weight shouldn’t matter. Even Dr. Oz was treated different when he was in a fat suit – he even said himself that he was made to feel bad about himself by the looks and comments by people.

  39. Maybe you missed the mark a little… I believe the point of Linda’s article was to point out that pushing a health problem under the rug (which is what the fat acceptance movement is trying to do) is no way to help people.

    1. I think the fat acceptance movement is trying to say is that you can’t ‘help’ people by making them feeling ashamed of themselves. A lot of fat people spend their lives trying to be smaller and hating themselves and not being successful, or trying to be thin in unhealthy ways.

      Therefore we should accept our bodies as they are and pursue healthy habits regardless. Healthy habits like exercise and increased fruit/vegetable intake will result in weightloss for some, and might not for others – either way it will have better long term health outcomes.

      Plus, since you can’t always tell a person’s health just by looking at their size it is ridiculous to think terrible things about bigger people. We’re all individuals.

      1. You can absolutely tell a persons health from their appearance. Jaundice, measles, downs syndrome(and other genetic abnormalities), stroke, critical-low blood pressure, gaping wounds, pregnancy, and many others. All biological conditions with an outward apperance. When someone goes pale and gets unsteady on their feet, do you stand back and let them fall?
        I suspect you would.

    2. I think perhaps you, and Linda Kelsey, have missed the mark in terms of the fat acceptance movement is trying to do. FA claims that size is not, and has no right to be, a determinant of how people are treated by society. Your beliefs about fat and your right to not like fat people or their fat, stops at my belly. How you choose to treat your body is your own business and I would not dream of telling you what you should do with your body. In the FA community, we fight for the same courtesy in a world which daily insists we’ve somehow forfeited that right.

      Health is not guaranteed to anyone of any size and forcing your body to be one size or another confers immunity to absolutely nothing. Healthy behaviors may factor in, but until you’re willing to mandate that everyone, regardless of size, avoid every kind of behavior the actuaries deem risky, policing fat people’s bodies or habits is still out of line.

      1. No. That’s what body acceptance does. FA just glorifies obesity and thin shames. All while putting it’s head in the sand about the well-documented medicine.

    3. And also, here in the UK the overall heath of the society’s members does effect everyone considering we are on nationalized heathcare. So this issue is far more about vanity.

      1. Sorry Kelley but I have to call BS on that comment. We are on nationalised health here in Australia too and the bigots in this country also push the same line you are, with the same inference that we are costing the community millions of dollars in healthcare by being obese. The problem with that line of thinking is it is based on an incorrect assumption that weight is a causal factor to all that ails us, and on the equally false presumption that “skinny means healthy and fat means sick”. I know of thin people who have a LOT more medical issues that us bigger girls and of plus-size lovelies who are fitter and healthier than their smaller counterparts. It is just plain discrimination that is allowed to flourish under the BS excuse of being “concerned for your health”.

        1. But weight IS the causal factor. There are HUNDREDS of published papers from many countries, with many sample sizes, multiple control methods.
          Heres a study that reviewed them all last year:
          http://jama.jamanetwork.com/article.aspx?articleID=1555137&%E2%80%9D
          Here’s one that describes the damage done to unborn babies due to the weight of their mothers: http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/87/6/1750.short
          Here’s one that explains how abdominal fat deposits are dangerous:
          http://circ.ahajournals.org/content/117/13/1658.short
          Here’s one speciffic study to show you how detaild this science is:
          http://www.nature.com/ki/journal/v55/n4/abs/4490726a.html

          PLEASE READ THE STUDIES BEFORE YOU TRY TO DENY THEM.

          You CANNOT say that you can be fat and healthy. It has been PROVED that the danger increases proportional to the amount of fat.
          The fatter you are: the more dangerous it becomes.

          1. Bullshit … pure and simple. And your ignorance exposes you for the bigot you are. You CAN be fat and healthy. You can dig up all the obscure links you like … it does NOT, I repeat NOT, make them relevant for every large person. It is as stupid as saying all people with green eyes are going to get glaucoma. Some people will and some fat people will get diabetes II. Not all green-eyed people will get glaucoma and not all fat people will develop diabetes. I know of skinny people who are diabetic too. You are just looking for excuses to justify your prejudices.

          2. No. You are the one who refused to read the scientific papers I supplied. Thats willful ignorance. Ignorance is a refusal to learn. I learned. You refuse, just so can live in blissful idiocy.
            The green eye example is so unbelievablely irrelevant, it proved how uneducated you really are.

          3. Sorry CeCe. I get so angry when bigoted opinions are spouted in the name of truth and that is just what this person was doing. She had blinkers on when it came to current medical opinions and it made me very angry. I did not intend to upset you.

          4. Awww trust me I totally understand! I just know things can cross the line quickly so I want to protect you girls! xoxo

          5. The name-calling isn’t half as big a problem as the lies. Current medical opinions are as I stated. If you disagree provide evidence. Blogs that promote this kind of psuedoscience are a detriment to society. And you feel it’s perfectly ok to call me a “bigot”?

    4. yeah but what dos she consider fat. She said at the end of her article call a fat girl fat. No apology needed. She is just a plain cunt. No apology given for using that word.

    5. How does she know that any one of those women are doing that? Most women I know struggle daily with their weight, far from sweeping it under the rug. She is advocating calling people ‘fat girl’. She’s just a dick.

  40. jasdoll16@gmail.com

    Maybe you missed the mark a little… I believe the point of Linda’s article was to point out that pushing a health problem under the rug (which is what the fat acceptance movement is trying to do) is no way to help people.

    1. alanna.inserra@gmail.com

      I think the fat acceptance movement is trying to say is that you can’t ‘help’ people by making them feeling ashamed of themselves. A lot of fat people spend their lives trying to be smaller and hating themselves and not being successful, or trying to be thin in unhealthy ways.
      Therefore we should accept our bodies as they are and pursue healthy habits regardless. Healthy habits like exercise and increased fruit/vegetable intake will result in weightloss for some, and might not for others – either way it will have better long term health outcomes.

      Plus, since you can’t always tell a person’s health just by looking at their size it is ridiculous to think terrible things about bigger people. We’re all individuals.

      1. jasdoll16@gmail.com

        You can absolutely tell a persons health from their appearance. Jaundice, measles, downs syndrome(and other genetic abnormalities), stroke, critical-low blood pressure, gaping wounds, pregnancy, and many others. All biological conditions with an outward apperance. When someone goes pale and gets unsteady on their feet, do you stand back and let them fall?I suspect you would.

    2. sndsfnny@msn.com

      I think perhaps you, and Linda Kelsey, have missed the mark in terms of the fat acceptance movement is trying to do. FA claims that size is not, and has no right to be, a determinant of how people are treated by society. Your beliefs about fat and your right to not like fat people or their fat, stops at my belly. How you choose to treat your body is your own business and I would not dream of telling you what you should do with your body. In the FA community, we fight for the same courtesy in a world which daily insists we’ve somehow forfeited that right.
      Health is not guaranteed to anyone of any size and forcing your body to be one size or another confers immunity to absolutely nothing. Healthy behaviors may factor in, but until you’re willing to mandate that everyone, regardless of size, avoid every kind of behavior the actuaries deem risky, policing fat people’s bodies or habits is still out of line.

      1. jasdoll16@gmail.com

        No. That’s what body acceptance does. FA just glorifies obesity and thin shames. All while putting it’s head in the sand about the well-documented medicine.

    3. kelley.mullarkey@gmail.com

      And also, here in the UK the overall heath of the society’s members does effect everyone considering we are on nationalized heathcare. So this issue is far more about vanity.

      1. chenushk@aapt.net.au

        Sorry Kelley but I have to call BS on that comment. We are on nationalised health here in Australia too and the bigots in this country also push the same line you are, with the same inference that we are costing the community millions of dollars in healthcare by being obese. The problem with that line of thinking is it is based on an incorrect assumption that weight is a causal factor to all that ails us, and on the equally false presumption that “skinny means healthy and fat means sick”. I know of thin people who have a LOT more medical issues that us bigger girls and of plus-size lovelies who are fitter and healthier than their smaller counterparts. It is just plain discrimination that is allowed to flourish under the BS excuse of being “concerned for your health”.

        1. jasdoll16@gmail.com

          But weight IS the causal factor. There are HUNDREDS of published papers from many countries, with many sample sizes, multiple control methods.Heres a study that reviewed them all last year:
          http://jama.jamanetwork.com/article.aspx?articleID=1555137&%E2%80%9D
          Here’s one that describes the damage done to unborn babies due to the weight of their mothers: http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/87/6/1750.short
          Here’s one that explains how abdominal fat deposits are dangerous:
          http://circ.ahajournals.org/content/117/13/1658.short
          Here’s one speciffic study to show you how detaild this science is:
          http://www.nature.com/ki/journal/v55/n4/abs/4490726a.html

          PLEASE READ THE STUDIES BEFORE YOU TRY TO DENY THEM.

          You CANNOT say that you can be fat and healthy. It has been PROVED that the danger increases proportional to the amount of fat.
          The fatter you are: the more dangerous it becomes.

          1. chenushk@aapt.net.au

            Bullshit … pure and simple. And your ignorance exposes you for the bigot you are. You CAN be fat and healthy. You can dig up all the obscure links you like … it does NOT, I repeat NOT, make them relevant for every large person. It is as stupid as saying all people with green eyes are going to get glaucoma. Some people will and some fat people will get diabetes II. Not all green-eyed people will get glaucoma and not all fat people will develop diabetes. I know of skinny people who are diabetic too. You are just looking for excuses to justify your prejudices.

          2. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            No. You are the one who refused to read the scientific papers I supplied. Thats willful ignorance. Ignorance is a refusal to learn. I learned. You refuse, just so can live in blissful idiocy.The green eye example is so unbelievablely irrelevant, it proved how uneducated you really are.

          3. chenushk@aapt.net.au

            Sorry CeCe. I get so angry when bigoted opinions are spouted in the name of truth and that is just what this person was doing. She had blinkers on when it came to current medical opinions and it made me very angry. I did not intend to upset you.

          4. cece@thebiggirlblog.com

            Awww trust me I totally understand! I just know things can cross the line quickly so I want to protect you girls! xoxo

          5. jasdoll16@gmail.com

            The name-calling isn’t half as big a problem as the lies. Current medical opinions are as I stated. If you disagree provide evidence. Blogs that promote this kind of psuedoscience are a detriment to society. And you feel it’s perfectly ok to call me a “bigot”?

    4. sydneydodds@hotmail.com

      yeah but what dos she consider fat. She said at the end of her article call a fat girl fat. No apology needed. She is just a plain cunt. No apology given for using that word.

    5. elanarab@yahoo.com

      How does she know that any one of those women are doing that? Most women I know struggle daily with their weight, far from sweeping it under the rug. She is advocating calling people ‘fat girl’. She’s just a dick.

  41. Horrible article. This lady has no right in judging anybody, esp not for their physical appearance. Totally agree with you on that.

    But to be honest, there’s one more thing that left me thinking. So far I had understood that you love yourself as you are (and that’s why I kind of started following you), but then you wrote you were working towards a better version of you, which is intended in the article as a skinnier version. Isn’t that a bit incoherent? If you love yourself so much with the way you currently look, why do you have to modify that? Are you just ‘faking’ being happy as a plus size while you ‘make’ it as a skinny girl? I got the whole being healthy part, and exercising and making smart food choices to obtain that. That’s super important in spite of your size (there are very unhealthy skinny ppl and the other way around.) I thought that was the whole point of your camp, or is it just another ‘diet’ so that PSPs can become Skinny Princesses?

    1. Hmmm…. That’s not what I said/wrote at all. Health is my goal… I think maybe you’re taking some of my sarcasm literally. xx

  42. majobv.design@gmail.com

    Horrible article. This lady has no right in judging anybody, esp not for their physical appearance. Totally agree with you on that.
    But to be honest, there’s one more thing that left me thinking. So far I had understood that you love yourself as you are (and that’s why I kind of started following you), but then you wrote you were working towards a better version of you, which is intended in the article as a skinnier version. Isn’t that a bit incoherent? If you love yourself so much with the way you currently look, why do you have to modify that? Are you just ‘faking’ being happy as a plus size while you ‘make’ it as a skinny girl? I got the whole being healthy part, and exercising and making smart food choices to obtain that. That’s super important in spite of your size (there are very unhealthy skinny ppl and the other way around.) I thought that was the whole point of your camp, or is it just another ‘diet’ so that PSPs can become Skinny Princesses?

    1. cece@thebiggirlblog.com

      Hmmm…. That’s not what I said/wrote at all. Health is my goal… I think maybe you’re taking some of my sarcasm literally. xx

  43. Fantastic post!!!! I wish there was more positive acceptance here in Australia … sadly a lot of people feel the same way this stupid English journo does!

  44. Fantastic post!!!! I wish there was more positive acceptance here in Australia … sadly a lot of people feel the same way this stupid English journo does!

  45. chenushk@aapt.net.au

    Fantastic post!!!! I wish there was more positive acceptance here in Australia … sadly a lot of people feel the same way this stupid English journo does!

  46. chenushk@aapt.net.au

    Fantastic post!!!! I wish there was more positive acceptance here in Australia … sadly a lot of people feel the same way this stupid English journo does!

  47. Love this, spot on. You are totally right of course. Some people choose to live in hate and judgement, such as the writer of that article. I feel for them a bit, to be honest. It mustn’t be nice inside a mind like that.

  48. … I get that having fat is unhealthy and some of us are selfconscious about it. Being PSP, you get reminded or lectured almost everyday what’s good for us by some people. I think that in this article, there was a lot of lack of tact shown. I think it is important in the society we live in to raise awareness, but yet she wrote this article clumsily. I’m selfconscious of how I look, I am going to college full time and I’m in my last sprint, and I will start again making exercise. I prepared myself for it mentally. Its not easy. Yes there is a question of motivation and willingness in that aspect but If I do it, it’s for my self-confidence and my health. Everybody has the right to have their opinion but we also forget how to rightfully choose our words in our everyday relationships and hurt some people with words… Whether you believe it or not, words can hurt. For myself, she gives me the motivation to push myself and prove her wrong!!!

  49. I am all for supporting fat people who want to get healthy. They deserve every support we can afford.
    I however do not support this new “movement” that has sprung up which is trying to normalise obesity. The Daily mail article was more about people not willing to work on their obesity but rather forcing others to consider them “normal”. Sorry obesity is not normal or beautiful.

    1. Obesity is not normal? Please tell me what planet you are from. “Obesity” isn’t some new fad people are trying. People act like being fat just happened over night. Fat is normal honey. There’s always been fat people on this planet and there’ll always be fat people on this planet. And as long as I know I’m beautiful, I can careless how the next person feel about me…

    2. DeAnna Michelle Payne

      You do realize that 60 years ago women were idolized for being curvy and voluptuous right? This movement isn’t new its old. Society has just brain washed people into thinking that a bigger girl cannot be beautiful.

  50. masterofceremonies1988@gmail.com

    I am all for supporting fat people who want to get healthy. They deserve every support we can afford.I however do not support this new “movement” that has sprung up which is trying to normalise obesity. The Daily mail article was more about people not willing to work on their obesity but rather forcing others to consider them “normal”. Sorry obesity is not normal or beautiful.

    1. shanikawilson0506@gmail.com

      Obesity is not normal? Please tell me what planet you are from. “Obesity” isn’t some new fad people are trying. People act like being fat just happened over night. Fat is normal honey. There’s always been fat people on this planet and there’ll always be fat people on this planet. And as long as I know I’m beautiful, I can careless how the next person feel about me…

    2. paynegirl209@gmail.com

      You do realize that 60 years ago women were idolized for being curvy and voluptuous right? This movement isn’t new its old. Society has just brain washed people into thinking that a bigger girl cannot be beautiful.

  51. Every day we have to live and dodge the hand grenades of judgment tossed our way…
    Thank you for writing this article and giving us a space to just “be”…

  52. brumuk@hotmail.com

    Every day we have to live and dodge the hand grenades of judgment tossed our way…Thank you for writing this article and giving us a space to just “be”…

  53. Marjorie Campbell

    A-to the MEN! That last bit about everyone working on something is so true. My guess about her issues is not something I already deleted from this comment. There are groups in our society who it is ok to target, it would seem, or to continue to marginalize. Ms Kelsey’s article is cheap and unworthy of being reproduced.

  54. marca1971@hotmail.com

    A-to the MEN! That last bit about everyone working on something is so true. My guess about her issues is not something I already deleted from this comment. There are groups in our society who it is ok to target, it would seem, or to continue to marginalize. Ms Kelsey’s article is cheap and unworthy of being reproduced.

  55. If you are healthy then yeah great job! Personally I think you should do what makes you happy. But I also have to say that a lot of young people are not caring about their health. We all know not all young people are like you, who exercise and eat good food. There will be some serious health issue if you don’t watch out for that. But at the same time, being healthy does not mean you have to be skinny. Eating health and exercise is just something you should do, and your body will adjust to the right size, for you. It’s really a public health issue. I think this writer is just using health as an excuse to express her hatred for fat people. If this is a real concern, it should be asking the FDA to actually control what’s in our food and what’s making people have all of those eating problems.

  56. whatever@whateverwhatever.com

    If you are healthy then yeah great job! Personally I think you should do what makes you happy. But I also have to say that a lot of young people are not caring about their health. We all know not all young people are like you, who exercise and eat good food. There will be some serious health issue if you don’t watch out for that. But at the same time, being healthy does not mean you have to be skinny. Eating health and exercise is just something you should do, and your body will adjust to the right size, for you. It’s really a public health issue. I think this writer is just using health as an excuse to express her hatred for fat people. If this is a real concern, it should be asking the FDA to actually control what’s in our food and what’s making people have all of those eating problems.

  57. Just to get it straight, do we all agree it’s NOT good when someone is at an unhealthy weight strictly because of their diet and lifestyle? (ie. They don’t have a medical condition, they just eat lots of fast food and choose not to exercise)

    I believe Linda was over-the-top harsh on what she said, but it can not be denied that there are an increasing number of obese people out there.

    Cece, you lost 50 pounds and that is absolutely awesome! I commend you for that. If people judge you because of your weight without knowing that (like Linda did in the airport), that’s not cool at all. But I believe Linda was trying to address (and I could be wrong) the issue of people who are endangering their health without attempting to fix it. Could she have said it a nicer way? Yes. Would the ones endangering themselves who truly need to hear the message listened had she said it nicer? I don’t know…

  58. iride4dozen6@yahoo.com

    Just to get it straight, do we all agree it’s NOT good when someone is at an unhealthy weight strictly because of their diet and lifestyle? (ie. They don’t have a medical condition, they just eat lots of fast food and choose not to exercise)
    I believe Linda was over-the-top harsh on what she said, but it can not be denied that there are an increasing number of obese people out there.

    Cece, you lost 50 pounds and that is absolutely awesome! I commend you for that. If people judge you because of your weight without knowing that (like Linda did in the airport), that’s not cool at all. But I believe Linda was trying to address (and I could be wrong) the issue of people who are endangering their health without attempting to fix it. Could she have said it a nicer way? Yes. Would the ones endangering themselves who truly need to hear the message listened had she said it nicer? I don’t know…

  59. I just read the first article (from Linda) and I love your response. The thing of it is, each human being has worth (even Linda!) and that worth has nothing to do with body size. Our culture currently loves thin bodies on women and young, unwrinkled faces. Men are judged as well, but I think to a much lesser degree than women. I’ve been thin and young, but now in my 40’s with extra weight (and three lovely children) I am witnessing full force that my culture sees me as a non-person. I’m a fat, older woman. It’s unsettling, and it’s wrong. I’m also a mother, a wife, a lover, a daughter, a dancer, a writer, and a teacher. I am so much more than what someone might casually observe, if they even gave me a second glance.

  60. lorriann@gmail.com

    I just read the first article (from Linda) and I love your response. The thing of it is, each human being has worth (even Linda!) and that worth has nothing to do with body size. Our culture currently loves thin bodies on women and young, unwrinkled faces. Men are judged as well, but I think to a much lesser degree than women. I’ve been thin and young, but now in my 40’s with extra weight (and three lovely children) I am witnessing full force that my culture sees me as a non-person. I’m a fat, older woman. It’s unsettling, and it’s wrong. I’m also a mother, a wife, a lover, a daughter, a dancer, a writer, and a teacher. I am so much more than what someone might casually observe, if they even gave me a second glance.

  61. A great read, “Do I Look Fat in This?” AKA Get Over Your Body and on with Your Life! by Rhonda Britten. We need to focus on what our bodies do and allow us to accomplish. Without my body I would never had the opportunity to birth six human beings. Without my body I would never feel or give a hug, hear someone’s voice, speak encouraging words…Without our bodies no one gets to experience the essence of who we are. That is what we need to focus on. Being grateful for the wonderful machines our bodies have been, will be, and in this moment, ARE! Smile…your heart needs it:)

  62. anonymized-1482647839@disqus.com

    A great read, “Do I Look Fat in This?” AKA Get Over Your Body and on with Your Life! by Rhonda Britten. We need to focus on what our bodies do and allow us to accomplish. Without my body I would never had the opportunity to birth six human beings. Without my body I would never feel or give a hug, hear someone’s voice, speak encouraging words…Without our bodies no one gets to experience the essence of who we are. That is what we need to focus on. Being grateful for the wonderful machines our bodies have been, will be, and in this moment, ARE! Smile…your heart needs it:)

  63. A great read, “Do I Look Fat in This?” AKA Get Over Your Body and on with Your Life! by Rhonda Britten. We need to focus on what our bodies allow us to accomplish. Without my body I would have never had the opportunity to birth six human beings. Without my body I would never feel or give a hug, hear someone’s voice, speak encouraging words… Without our bodies no one gets to experience the essence of WHO we are. That is what we need to focus on. Being grateful for the wonderful machines our bodies have been, will be, and in this moment, ARE! Smile…your heart needs it:)

  64. roses122255@msn.com

    A great read, “Do I Look Fat in This?” AKA Get Over Your Body and on with Your Life! by Rhonda Britten. We need to focus on what our bodies allow us to accomplish. Without my body I would have never had the opportunity to birth six human beings. Without my body I would never feel or give a hug, hear someone’s voice, speak encouraging words… Without our bodies no one gets to experience the essence of WHO we are. That is what we need to focus on. Being grateful for the wonderful machines our bodies have been, will be, and in this moment, ARE! Smile…your heart needs it:)

  65. I have watched a woman lose over 200# and she is still on her journey. I see others who don’t understand her jovial spirit. They don’t know her history and just judge her as some “fat slob.” My how their jaws drop when I tell them of her struggles. First just to walk around one city block. It took her over a month to accomplish what they have so easily taken for granted. At this point, she has at least 70# of skin that needs to be removed, but not yet say the doctors. They want to limit her surgery risks. It’s NOT about losing the weight. It’s all about the internal changes that accompany it as well. Keep smiling!

  66. roses122255@msn.com

    I have watched a woman lose over 200# and she is still on her journey. I see others who don’t understand her jovial spirit. They don’t know her history and just judge her as some “fat slob.” My how their jaws drop when I tell them of her struggles. First just to walk around one city block. It took her over a month to accomplish what they have so easily taken for granted. At this point, she has at least 70# of skin that needs to be removed, but not yet say the doctors. They want to limit her surgery risks. It’s NOT about losing the weight. It’s all about the internal changes that accompany it as well. Keep smiling!

  67. I think this is one of the most eloquent rebuttals I have ever had the pleasure to read. Thank you for speaking on behalf of all of us!

  68. Hsegelke@aol.com

    I think this is one of the most eloquent rebuttals I have ever had the pleasure to read. Thank you for speaking on behalf of all of us!

  69. I have to weigh in here…I just read Ema’s rant and although her protestations were awkward, hear heart was in the right place. By educating us with her facts and figures I think she feels that she is saving our lives. The fact IS that overweight is a killer.
    I have news for Ema:
    WE ARE NOT STUPID.
    We know the statistics…most of us can quote them to her by heart. We have anecdotals in our own day to day lives.
    I have been overweight since birth. I have lost 100 pounds twice..and gained it back.
    I have been turned down employment.
    I have been denied love by men I adored.
    I have been considered lazy, ignorant….and openly ridiculed.
    Because of how I look…not because people were concerned about my well being.
    Like most overweight people, I continue to strive to get to a healthy weight. I was at a healthy weight and looked “normal” when I got pregnant. I gained over 100 lbs.
    Incidentally, is Ema aware that you can gain fat cells, but even if you lose weight, they never go away? That means that if you regain weight, you gain fat cells on top of already existing fat cells. After 30, your metabolism slows…and it only gets worse from there.
    DARLING, THE DECK IS ALREADY STACKED AGAINST US!
    This is NOT a rationalization, this is a fact.
    Does it mean I give up…ignore the risks? Absolutely not. I keep fighting.
    But please do not characterize me or any other of my sisters here as ignorant, foolish or uneducated. ALL of us could educate YOU on good nutrition.
    Wanna know why? WE’VE BEEN ON EVERY DIET CREATED BY EVERY NUTRITIONIST ENDORSED BY EVERY DOCTOR EVERYWHERE.
    I exercise 3-4 days a week and eat 1800 calories a day. Ema, please forgive me for only being able to hold my own at a size 22-24…it seems my body is just not listening to your “wisdom”.
    Honey, gain 100 pounds and then I invite you to go jogging for an hour.
    What? It’s tough?
    You’d have to be superhuman, tough as nails, brave as hell to do it?
    Damn right, I AM!

    1. I never said everyone reading was stupid, why would I assume that? I was trying to correct some very bad science, for someone that didn’t seem to know how to research. (it’s called Google Scholar, pretty straightforward).
      You don’t gain new fat cells every time you gain weight. You might develop additional fat vacuoles within dermal and hypodermal cells, but the number of cells stays much the same.
      I seriously doubt you have a better knowledge of nutrition. You really are making assumptions there.

      1. You may not have said people are stupid, but your tone implies it heavily. I respect your desire to stick to facts (though even facts can be deployed to prove a point), but your tone (e.g. “it’s called Google Scholar, pretty straightforward”) is deeply patronising.

  70. Hsegelke@aol.com

    I have to weigh in here…I just read Ema’s rant and although her protestations were awkward, hear heart was in the right place. By educating us with her facts and figures I think she feels that she is saving our lives. The fact IS that overweight is a killer.I have news for Ema:
    WE ARE NOT STUPID.
    We know the statistics…most of us can quote them to her by heart. We have anecdotals in our own day to day lives.
    I have been overweight since birth. I have lost 100 pounds twice..and gained it back.
    I have been turned down employment.
    I have been denied love by men I adored.
    I have been considered lazy, ignorant….and openly ridiculed.
    Because of how I look…not because people were concerned about my well being.
    Like most overweight people, I continue to strive to get to a healthy weight. I was at a healthy weight and looked “normal” when I got pregnant. I gained over 100 lbs.
    Incidentally, is Ema aware that you can gain fat cells, but even if you lose weight, they never go away? That means that if you regain weight, you gain fat cells on top of already existing fat cells. After 30, your metabolism slows…and it only gets worse from there.
    DARLING, THE DECK IS ALREADY STACKED AGAINST US!
    This is NOT a rationalization, this is a fact.
    Does it mean I give up…ignore the risks? Absolutely not. I keep fighting.
    But please do not characterize me or any other of my sisters here as ignorant, foolish or uneducated. ALL of us could educate YOU on good nutrition.
    Wanna know why? WE’VE BEEN ON EVERY DIET CREATED BY EVERY NUTRITIONIST ENDORSED BY EVERY DOCTOR EVERYWHERE.
    I exercise 3-4 days a week and eat 1800 calories a day. Ema, please forgive me for only being able to hold my own at a size 22-24…it seems my body is just not listening to your “wisdom”.
    Honey, gain 100 pounds and then I invite you to go jogging for an hour.
    What? It’s tough?
    You’d have to be superhuman, tough as nails, brave as hell to do it?
    Damn right, I AM!

    1. jasdoll16@gmail.com

      I never said everyone reading was stupid, why would I assume that? I was trying to correct some very bad science, for someone that didn’t seem to know how to research. (it’s called Google Scholar, pretty straightforward).You don’t gain new fat cells every time you gain weight. You might develop additional fat vacuoles within dermal and hypodermal cells, but the number of cells stays much the same.
      I seriously doubt you have a better knowledge of nutrition. You really are making assumptions there.

      1. katebradley@supanet.com

        You may not have said people are stupid, but your tone implies it heavily. I respect your desire to stick to facts (though even facts can be deployed to prove a point), but your tone (e.g. “it’s called Google Scholar, pretty straightforward”) is deeply patronising.

  71. So, I read that article and your own.
    And I think that you let the biggest insult slide.
    She called big people “greedy” and worst of all, “ignorant”. Now, you can call me greedy, you can call me fat, but you cannot call me an ignoramus.
    How many calories I need to eat to lose weight at a healthy rate is none of your business (900 fyi. Yay metabolic issues!), and that “none of your business” most definitely applies to what’s in my head. I may be fat, but just because I’m fat doesn’t mean I’m stupid. Surprising idea, I know.
    I’m disappointed that everyone else felt the need to defend various body shapes, fit-but-fat individuals, curvaceous-confidence and their general health but neglected to defend their most important asset — their brains.

  72. clarady100@gmail.com

    So, I read that article and your own.And I think that you let the biggest insult slide.
    She called big people “greedy” and worst of all, “ignorant”. Now, you can call me greedy, you can call me fat, but you cannot call me an ignoramus.
    How many calories I need to eat to lose weight at a healthy rate is none of your business (900 fyi. Yay metabolic issues!), and that “none of your business” most definitely applies to what’s in my head. I may be fat, but just because I’m fat doesn’t mean I’m stupid. Surprising idea, I know.
    I’m disappointed that everyone else felt the need to defend various body shapes, fit-but-fat individuals, curvaceous-confidence and their general health but neglected to defend their most important asset — their brains.

  73. Well…this comment’s section escalated pretty quickly! I’m such a cheerleader! Can I just say I loved your post? And I darn near awakened my 3 month old daughter at the “Linda, listen to me (listen to me Linda!)” But seriously…I’m an advocate of living whole, meaning all parts of one’s self should have wellness (mind, body and spirit). So if wearing a horizontal striped crop top helps me to feel “whole” then it will be worn!

  74. Well…this comment’s section escalated pretty quickly! I’m such a cheerleader! Can I just say I loved your post? And I darn near awakened my 3 month old daughter at the “Linda, listen to me (listen to me Linda!)” But seriously…I’m an advocate of living whole, meaning all parts of one’s self should have wellness (mind, body and spirit). So if wearing a horizontal striped crop top helps me to feel “whole” then it will be worn!

  75. I can’t believe she actually wrote that kind of article. I am at a loss for words. Comparing weight problems to smoking? So if I understand correctly, me being in public is as harmful to other people’s health as smoking? And if, god forbid, I decide to go on a vacation with my friends, I should wear a long black cloth, covering all bare skin, no matter how hot it is outside? And also, I can’t laugh and should be worried about my weight all the time and clearly show that to people around me so that they wouldn’t think I am not concerned about it?

    I wonder if she could publish the entire guide for fat people how to behave in order not to offend her majesty Ms Linda.
    She mentions ED as if it was something only skinny girls can have and as if ED showed your driven personality and wish to achieve a lot in life. She is so ignorant, it’s terrible.

  76. I can’t believe she actually wrote that kind of article. I am at a loss for words. Comparing weight problems to smoking? So if I understand correctly, me being in public is as harmful to other people’s health as smoking? And if, god forbid, I decide to go on a vacation with my friends, I should wear a long black cloth, covering all bare skin, no matter how hot it is outside? And also, I can’t laugh and should be worried about my weight all the time and clearly show that to people around me so that they wouldn’t think I am not concerned about it?
    I wonder if she could publish the entire guide for fat people how to behave in order not to offend her majesty Ms Linda.
    She mentions ED as if it was something only skinny girls can have and as if ED showed your driven personality and wish to achieve a lot in life. She is so ignorant, it’s terrible.

  77. Great post, written with wisdom, knowledge, and kindness — bravo! I’m so impressed by how you repeatedly open your heart up and live with vulnerability and such love for yourself and others. Thank you for encouraging and inspiring many, including myself, who are on this grand journey of life! And that’s what it is — a journey, with many challenges and struggles along the way. Whether they are physically evident or not, we all have to face them, and I hope to do so as gracefully and vivaciously as you. Much love!!

  78. mgkw@fastmail.net

    Great post, written with wisdom, knowledge, and kindness — bravo! I’m so impressed by how you repeatedly open your heart up and live with vulnerability and such love for yourself and others. Thank you for encouraging and inspiring many, including myself, who are on this grand journey of life! And that’s what it is — a journey, with many challenges and struggles along the way. Whether they are physically evident or not, we all have to face them, and I hope to do so as gracefully and vivaciously as you. Much love!!

  79. Omg Linda Kelsey disgusts me!!! She says being big is unattractive and wrong but look at her, she is not big and she is the ugliest and most unattractive women I have ever seen. You would think she would have a little more compassion for people who struggle with there weight when she struggles with being a ugly women. That is so mean to me take picture of women who don’t need her telling them they are plus size. I hope that she does not think she is better then anyone else just because they may be bigger then her.

  80. www.stacyxoxo@gmail.com

    Omg Linda Kelsey disgusts me!!! She says being big is unattractive and wrong but look at her, she is not big and she is the ugliest and most unattractive women I have ever seen. You would think she would have a little more compassion for people who struggle with there weight when she struggles with being a ugly women. That is so mean to me take picture of women who don’t need her telling them they are plus size. I hope that she does not think she is better then anyone else just because they may be bigger then her.

  81. “Sometimes I wonder if its not my fat body that people hate, but the happiness, joy and full life I have in spite of it.” Yes. This is the crux of the problem. Awesome letter!!

  82. “Sometimes I wonder if its not my fat body that people hate, but the happiness, joy and full life I have in spite of it.” Yes. This is the crux of the problem. Awesome letter!!

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