Tag Archives: BBW Club

I Gave Him My Number (Part One)

The minute I locked eyes with the tall chocolate man behind the register at Urban Outfitters, something inside me awakened. It wasn’t love at first sight, but more like whoa you’re really hot and you keep looking at me maybe you think I’m hot too— whatever feeling that is. He kept glancing over at me from behind the counter and I kept pretending not to notice, while panicking on the inside. I was buying candles and a pair of sunglasses (all that would fit me from that store), and wasn’t sure what I should do if by chance I was called to his register.

This was (before Robert) when I was starting to understand that a Plus Size Princess can never predict who will be attracted to her. I had been going to the BBW parties in NYC and the experience of going to bars/clubs where my size was not an issue was doing amazing things for my confidence.

So there I am, making eyes with the store clerk at Urban Outfitters with butterflies in my stomach. I was next in line and there was a 50/50 chance I would be called to his register… but do to a missing price tag, I wasn’t. Instead I was waited on by a polite hipster girl who wrapped my sunglasses in tissue paper and sent me on my way. As I tucked my credit card into my wallet I snuck one last glance over to my chocolate cashier and to my terror/glee he was staring at me too and he smiled.

When I got home, I was still thinking about him. Without speaking he had stirred something up in me and I couldn’t ignore it. I wanted to know more about him and the way he looked at me was as if he was interested. Before I realized what I was doing, I googled the phone number for Urban Outfitters and dialed it.

“Urban Outfitters, how can I help you?” a cheerful woman answered.

I froze– I hadn’t really thought through what I would say, so I began to wing it.

“Hi… Um… I was just in your store and I think one of my friends was working the register but– the line was so long I couldn’t speak to him… he’s a really tall black guy with a bald head?”

“Oh, yeah– Brian, he’s here but he’s on break.”

“Okay, um… can I maybe leave a message for him?”

“Sure,”

“Okay– Can you tell him that CeCe called. Here’s my number…”

I gave her my name and number, hung up the phone and exhaled deeply. It was a random slightly stalkerish thing to do, but somehow it made me feel better. I was becoming more fearless when it came to men, less convinced that everyone was going to reject me. This was good.

Two hours later, my phone rang with a number I didn’t recognize.

“Hello?”

“Yeah, this is Brian, someone left a message for me to call this number… CeCe?”

“Yeah, that’s me, um… hi.”

“Hello”

“I was in the store today and you kept looking at me… I just… I just wanted you to have my number and I figured since you were at work you couldn’t ask for it.”

“Oh,” he laughed. “Well, a lot of girls come in the store. What do you look like?”

I couldn’t bring myself to describe myself as big/plus size/fat (I’ve grown more since then, but at that time it wasn’t happening) so I offered to text him a picture.

“Okay cool,” he replied. “send it to me now, I’m about to get on the train though.”

We hung up and I sent my most recent, cutest, full body pic. I figured I was being more forward than I had ever been before, there was no need to hide now. 40 minutes later I had a text back:

You are so beautiful

Ready for Part two? Click here!

Plus Size Dating & Race: Does it Matter?

Disclaimer: This is a subject I’ve wanted to write about for a while. I look forward to hearing your thoughts, but anything offensive or hateful will be deleted.

“Overheard in New York” is one of my favorite blogs. As the name of the site implies, people submit snippets of conversation that they’ve overheard while being in NYC. Here is a post that I found the other day (excuse the language):

When I read this, my first thought was what on earth does race have to do with size? I wrote this guy off as a lunatic, until I began to think back to my days at the BBW clubs in NYC. More specifically at Goddesses. On any given night, it seemed that

-most of the Black men were giving attention to the big White women

-most of the White men gravitated towards the big Black and/or Latina women

-most the Latin men were more open, spending time with all the women (as long as they could dance).

Every time I was at Goddesses I would notice interracial couplings all over the dance floor. One night I was sitting at the bar with Paige and Reese, when a stunning Italian looking guy with perfect teeth walked in. Paige let out a deep sigh and said “Look at Danny, he’s so HOT… too bad he only dates Black girls.” A few minutes later a gorgeous Black man came into the club. He grabbed a drink and spent the rest of the night cozying up to the biggest woman at the party, who happened to be white.

I’m starting to wonder this is just coincidence, or if a lot of these men will only date Plus Size Princesses of a certain race. More specifically, a race outside of their own.

I have more thoughts but I know race can be a complicated subject, so I’m going to stop here and let you guys chime in.

Are you a White/Black/Latina/Asian PSP who feels like your race has an effect on your dating life? Do you find that men of a certain race hit on you more? When it comes to Plus Size Dating… does race matter?

Can You Really Find Love in a Bar or Club?

Ever notice how songs always promote the same story?

“I spotted you from across the bar… took your hand and led you to the dance floor … and as we danced we fell in love.”

I’ve been getting a lot of emails asking me about the BBW Club scene in New York City and before I tell people where they can go, I always feel the need to tell them not to expect anything. Maybe I’m trying to save them from the rude awakening I had….

Moving to NYC, where the night life is pretty major, I could not wait to start going to clubs so that I could fall in love. When my friends and I scored fake ID’s I knew that it would be a matter of time until I found love in the club. (Gosh, I was so naive!)

After a few weekends partying with the 21+ crowds in Manhattan, reality hit as I watched my skinny girl friends get picked up over and over by different guys while I stood awkwardly watching and trying not to feel uncomfortable. I was so jealous when guys would ask for their numbers. In my mind, they were living the music video dream! Meeting guys in clubs and bars…

I can remember going with Kenzie to a country bar where the girls were encouraged to dance on the bar for free shots. Kenzie and I were moving our hips to “you can leave your hat on” when a gorgeous blue-eyed, curly haired man raised his glass to me from down on the floor. When I jumped down and took my shot, he bought me a drink. Then we danced to country songs and I let him kiss me in the middle of the dance floor. Soon we weren’t even dancing… we were just making out in the middle of the dance floor. “You’re so beautiful”, “I’m so glad I met you,” he would whisper in between kisses. He asked for my number and I stared at my phone for weeks waiting for Heath (that was his name) to call, but he never did.

Two months later, Kenzie and I went back and Heath was there, he barely remembered me and I felt like an idiot.

Fast forward to my time at the BBW clubs. Once I started hitting up the places where my size didn’t matter, I was sure that I would start living my own music video dream. Guys would spot me from across the room… pull me onto the dance floor… I would start to think “this is it”… I would feel the guys warm breath on my neck as he held me close. I would wonder if this would be the moment we would start to feel something for each other, but the only thing I would “feel” would be in the guys pants. Awkward!

The guys who did ask for my number rarely wanted anything more than to “come to my apartment and hang out”. Or to text me randomly at 2am. The guys I met in the club weren’t looking for love, they were looking to fulfill their lust.

Eventually I grew up a little, I stopped looking at bars and clubs as a place to meet men and started seeing them as a place to let loose and have fun. I have a few friends that met their boyfriends/husbands in bars, but from what I can see those girls are the exception, not the rule.

All of the substantial men I’ve dated have been from the internet, at work or through friends… not at clubs. But that’s me!

Have YOU ever found love in the club?

California BBW Clubs

Walking into my first BBW Party in Los Angeles was like walking into a high school dance.

Club Bounce was located in the ballroom of a budget hotel. There were three large women collecting tickets behind a folding table. Once we paid our cover, our names were immediately dropped into a raffle bowl for prizes that would be announced later that night. I’ve never seen these things at mainstream clubs, but BBW clubs seem to think we come out for the chance at a free digital camera (*shrugs*).

Vanessa, my friend who works for Kiyonna (maybe some of you have seen her videos?) looked fabulous in a black dress with rouching up the front and funky boots and I was rocking my Kiyonna BoHo Chic look in honor of her. We both looked good and were feeling good after a nice dinner filled with girl talk.

Vanessa and I walked to the bar and ordered drinks and the high school vibe continued. On one side of the room were small clusters of Plus Size Princesses of all shapes, sizes, colors and ages. On the other side of the room were all the men. The DJ was playing music to an empty dance floor and balloons waived slowly under the air conditioner.

There was no mingling or flirting, everyone just sat in their respective corners and drank for about an hour.

Eventually some girls got up and began to dance with each other. Then slowly a crowd began to form on the dance floor. Vanessa and I were dancing too when I spotted a PSP sitting in the corner with her hands folded in her lap. I’m not sure if it was the high school dance elements of the night, but seeing her sitting there like a wall flower really made me sad so I marched over to her.

“Hi, are you here by yourself?” I asked.

“Yes,” she replied with a shy smile.

“Oh, wow… how are you liking it so far?”

“Its fine… I mean I’ve never been to a club before so…”

“Never been to a club, ever?!”

“Nope.”

I called Vanessa over, “this is Vanessa and I’m CeCe… come hang with us!” I said motioning for her to stand up. She hesitated and then said “okay”.

Being at a party alone is never fun, so Vanessa and I took her under our wing for the night. Watching her was fascinating because things like a guy asking her to dance were clearly new to her. As she danced with one guy, he turned her back to so that he could dance with her from behind and she thought he was done with her, so she kept walking and left him on the dancefloor. I had to tell her to turn around because he was standing there confused!

Over all the guys at Club Bounce weren’t very exciting. In my opinion, they made their business clear when they didn’t bother to talk and mingle with the PSP’s early in the night. It almost seemed as if they waited for the girls to get liquored up so that they could spend the evening humping them on the dance floor. I even heard one guy mention that he had a hotel room upstairs, which was a little disheartening.

Of course, we all know that NYC BBW clubs aren’t a place to look for love, and the California clubs are no different from what I can tell. But you never know… I was inspired when I noticed a nerdy guy in a sweater vest approaching our shy friend in a very repsectful way. Vanessa and I left them alone on the dance floor where they danced to song after song after song.

I felt like a proud Mom!

A Plus Size… Prince?

Remember Paige and Reese?

Well, Reese called out of the blue the other night and asked if I wanted to go to DIVAS. I hadn’t been to DIVAS in forever, mainly because the party had become kind of a joke. When I first started going there, it was a packed event with new guys to meet every time, but lately it was the same few women and a handful of men who were either old, gay or just weird. For me, this made paying the $20 cover a little silly (especially in this economy).

“C’mon, I’ll pay for you” Reese begged after I explained to her why I didn’t wasn’t interested.

“You don’t have to do that,”

“Look, I don’t ever have a babysitter on a Saturday night, but tonight I do and I want to go out! You’d be doing me a favor by going with me”

I let out a deep sigh.

“Great, I’ll pick you up at ten!” she said, hanging up the phone.

A few hours later, we walked into DIVAS and I immediately gave Reese a look. It was so dead in there that I think I actually heard crickets chirping. It was nice to catch up with Reese, but as far as I was concerned, we could have talked over drinks for free at hundreds of other bars in the city. I did my best not to pout though, because as a single mom, Reese didn’t get out much. Even though this night seemed to be a bust, we could make the best of it.

I ordered a round of martinis for the two of us and when I pulled out my wallet to pay for them, the bartender told me that it had been taken care of my a man at the end of the bar.

I looked over and the man waved casually, he looked slightly familiar. I smiled and waved him over.

“Hi, I’m Andrew.”

“I’m Celeste and this is my friend Reese, thanks for the drinks.”

“No problem, cheers,” he said flatly, raising his glass.

There was an awkward silence.

Reese slid off of her bar stool, “I’ll be back… I’m going to go say ‘hi’ to some people.”

Andrew leaned on the bar in front of me, “do you remember me?” he asked.

“I don’t know, I feel like I know you, but I can’t place you….”

“We met here, damn, probably a year ago?”

“Really?”

“Yes, really” he said, mockingly “its cool that you don’t remember me though…” he sniffled and wiped away a fake tear.

I laughed.

I spent the rest of the night calculating my interest in Andrew. He was very sweet, but sometimes said things that were a bit sarcastic, making me feel silly. When he followed me to the dance floor I quickly realized that he couldn’t dance. Also, he wasn’t really my type; he was tall, which I liked, but he was kinda pudgy. I’d never dated a PSPrince before, but I figured I’d give him a chance.

When he asked for my number, I gave it to him and when he called Sunday night to see if I wanted to meet up this week, I said yes.

I think I’m seeing him tomorrow night, I’ll keep you posted!

A Night at The Big Girl Club

BBW parties arent something that you can find everywhere, so I thought I’d offer a glimpse into a night on The Scene. The different BBW parties, which I call “Divas”, “Rewind” and “Satellite” respectively all have a different crowds. On this particular night, I was at Rewind.

Its always nice to see PSP’s dressing to show off their curves, on any given night, you will see form fitting dresses, mini skirts and low cut tops.

The DJ is always good at “Rewind” (“Divas” is a different story, since their DJ is an older man who seems a bit out of touch). But at “Rewind” you will always find a place to groove either in the Hip-Hop or Reggae room.


The clubs on the scene are very accepting… there’s not a lot of pretentiousness like you’d find at other NYC clubs. Everyone is welcome…

…and I mean EVERYONE!

People come to have a good time and dance, but who knows, you may just find love in the club!

I’ve Been “Outed” as Fat!!

I jumped out of the shower, and danced down the hallway to my bedroom. I had just purchased a new shade of eyeshadow, Beyonce was blaring from my speakers and my curling iron was heating up next to a glass of wine… I was going out!

It had been ages since Dana and I been to any clubs on The Scene. Tonight we were going to DIVAS and I was ready to dance and get my mind off of Jeremy. As I snapped my fingers and hummed along with Beyonce, my phone rang. It was my best friend, Adam.

“Hey, do you have plans tonight?”

My stomach tightened a bit. Adam and I had been friends since forever, I told him everything… everything except that I sometimes went to clubs for big girls and the guys who are attracted to them. I keep this from him because, that’s what closeted fat girl‘s do.

“Tonight? Um… I told my friend I’d go to a party with her,” I said, pleased that I was able to answer that question truthfully.

“Oh, cool… where?” He asked.

“Um, somewhere downtown… I need to look up the address.”

I wasn’t exactly lying to Adam, but I was withholding information, which I hated. I quickly got off the phone with him before he could ask more questions and went back to getting ready. Its funny, when I go out to mainstream clubs, I often feel like I put a whole bunch of effort into looking cute, only to be ignored. While my skinny friends can go out in dirty jeans and an old t-shirt and get approached by guys all night. So when I get dressed to go out on The Scene, it feels like there’s actually a means to an end when I get dolled up.

For this particular evening I kept it simple: Light-wash jeans (tucked into black Ugg boots) a black off the shoulder top, and a purple shoulder bag with a big bow on the front. It was warm but NYC winter standards, so I covered up with my leather motorcycle jacket and a paisley pashmina.
I walked into DIVAS, paid the cover charge (augh!) and got in line to check my coat.

“CeCe?” I heard a male voice say.

I turned around and froze. It was Matthew… Matthew lived with my friend Jason… and Jason is a CLOSE friend of… ADAM… my best friend! I was being outed. All I could think was “damage control”, so I jumped right in:

“Hey!”

“Wow, good to see you!” he said, hugging me.

“Yeah, um– you too,” my voice was a few octaves higher than usual.

“I’ve never seen you here before… do you come here often?”

“Nope, this is my first time…” I lied.

I felt like I was regaining control of the situation, by pretending that I was new to The Scene. Then, as if on cue; Maggie and Jane (regulars at DIVAS with whom I have become friendly) entered the club, when they saw me at coat check, they came at me shrieking simultaneously:

“Oh my GAWD!” “CeCe!” “We’ve missed you!!!” “Where have you been?” “You never called me back!”

I could feel my face getting hot. “I’m sorry, I have to go to the ladies room!” I blurted out. I pushed past them, saw Dana at the bar and motioned for her to follow me into the bathroom.

“What’s wrong?” Dana asked as she rushed in after me.

I explained everything.

“BAHAHAHA!!!” Dana has a habit of laughing in my face about things that stress me out and in this case I couldn’t blame her. The way we approached our weight and our lives as PSP’s was very different. She was forthright about her size and had told most of her friends and family about the BBW parties, while I chose it keep it a secret. It seemed like my silence was catching up to me and she was enjoying every minute of it.

I, on the other hand was freaking out, until I remembered something: The first time I met Matthew, I could have sworn that he was attracted to me by the way he interacted with me. Of course I have a big girl complex where I assume men are never attracted to me, so I pushed the thought aside quickly, but apparently, I was right. I knew I needed to get over being discovered at a big girl club and I had already paid the cover (augh!), so I wasn’t going home. I decided to make the most of the night. I composed myself and went out on the dance floor where I caught a glimpse of Matthew grinding on a hefty woman in a green dress. A short man with nicely toned arms grabbed Dana and they began dancing. I couldn’t let this situation keep me from doing my thing on the dance floor, so I too began to move and spent the night dancing and flirting.

Soon I found myself at the bar, needing a bottle of water but ordering a french martini. A hand, holding a $20 bill slid onto the bar on my left side. I turned around and it was Matthew, “I’ve got it” he said. I thanked him and began to explain my awkward behavior. I was searching for the words to politely beg him not to “out” me to my friends when he leaned in and whispered in my ear.

“Listen, I don’t want to be weird or anything but… I love this club. I love the women here, I think they are so sexy… but its something I do on my own time, do you know what I mean? and now that I’m dating Lisa, I just don’t think my coming here is something she’d be too happy…”

Before he could finish his sentence, the hefty girl in the green dress came up over and wrapped her arms around him. “Hey sexy” he said, giving her a squeeze. I smiled to hide my disbelief. Lisa was a girl I had met a few times and she could not have been more than a size 6. He was in a relationship with Lisa, but spent “his time” hugged up with a woman three times her size.

“So,” he continued. “Can we keep this between us?”

It was then that I realized… I wasn’t the only one scared of being outed.

“Sure, its between us.”

Battle of the Big Girls

It was Saturday afternoon and Paige was calling me, that could only mean one thing… she wanted to go to DIVAS. I didn’t have plans so we decided to meet up around 10:30pm and head downtown… I had lost 20 pounds and Paige spent the whole train ride talking about it. “Oh my God, what am I gonna do when you’re all skinny?”, “You’re going to be small and leave me at DIVAS all alone!”, “All the guys are going to be all over you tonight!”

When we arrived, the place was packed and Paige and I had to push through a sea of soft bodies just to get to the dance floor. Through the crowd I noticed a guy with a newsboy cap on. He was very attractive and tall, and looking in our direction. I leaned over to Paige, “That guy is so cute!” I yelled over the music. At that moment another guy grabbed me to dance. As I danced with him I watched Paige turn on her heel and walk over to “newsboy cap”. She whispered something into his ear, turned and pointed to me, he glanced up, saw me and whispered back to her. Then she took his hand and they began to dance.

The night continued like this, Paige and I dancing with different guys, people buying us drinks etc. During a song I didn’t particularly like, I took a seat on one of the couches surrounding the dance floor. I felt someone standing over me, it was the “newsboy”.

“Mind if I sit down?” he asked

“Sure,” I replied, scooting over. Newsboy was from Brooklyn and he worked as a manager for the Marriott in Times Square. After chatting for a while, he motioned for me to come closer.

“I have a confession,” he whispered. “Earlier your friend asked me which one of you was cuter… I didn’t want to be rude, so I told her that you were both beautiful girls, but I really wanted to say– you.”

“Um, thanks” I said. I could feel my face getting hot, not because of his compliment, but because Paige would even ask such a question… I was not in competition with her and pitting us against each other wasn’t cool… it was awkward.

Suddenly the DJ switched songs and Newsboy jumped up “This is my joint, right here!” he said taking my hand. He rocked and grooved to “Buddy” by Musiq. I liked the beat of the song but didn’t agree with the lyrics that spoke of a guy looking for a casual sex partner (aka a “Buddy”).

For the rest of the night Newsboy and I were inseparable. When he offered to drive Paige and me uptown so we wouldn’t have to take the subway late at night we agreed. Paige lives in the Bronx and I live in Manhattan, so we drove her as far as we could and she took a cab the rest of the way.

As Newsboy drove me home that “Buddy” song came on the radio. He reached over and turned the music up singing “It would be fly… if you were my B-U-D-D-Y…”

As we neared my apartment, Newsboy asked if he could come up. I said no. He pulled into an open parking space across the street from my building. “Lets just sit here and talk then” he said. He unbuckled my seat belt and put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me towards him. He asked questions like “Did you have fun tonight?” and “You know I’m really feeling you, right?” I sat there rigid, with my head on his shoulder wanting to believe what he was saying. As he played with the ends of my hair, he began to tell me how glad he was to have met me and how I sexy I was.

“You should let me come up,” he whispered. “I promise you wont regret it.”

I reached under my seat to retrieve my purse so I could get out of the car. I wasn’t exactly surprised that a guy who is obsessed with a song about having a “sex buddy” was acting this way. But I was frustrated because newsboy was so cute! He was making me wish for a moment that I was the type of girl who could have a guy up for a no strings attached night… but I wasn’t that girl.

“Goodnight.” I said as I went to open the door.

“Hey” he said.

I turned around and he gave me a big smile. “You can’t blame a guy for trying.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. I leaned in to give him a hug and when I pulled away, he kissed me. Everything in me said to get out of the car, but I didn’t move. I let him kiss me again and before I knew it I was kissing him back. Maybe I can do this… I thought. I closed my eyes and let his lips travel down my neck. Maybe this isn’t so bad…

“Lemme show you what I’m workin‘ with” he murmured into my hair.

I was lost in my own thoughts when I heard a “ziiiip” I opened my eyes and saw that Newsboy was proudly showing me his…um… “newsboy”. The sight of it jolted me back to reality.

Very few of the guys that go to DIVAS are looking for anything more than one night, so what is the point of the gorgeous plus size princesses who go to DIVAS pitting themselves up against each other? So, Newsboy liked me and not Paige– that didn’t mean I’d have a chance at a relationship, a date or even a connection… the only thing that insured was that he was going to try and have sex with me and that’s not worth any competition.

I grabbed my purse and jumped out of the car. “Have a good night okay?”

“Yeah,” he said. “I’ll call you later.”

It wasn’t until my elevator doors closed behind me that I realized he didn’t even have my phone number.

Model Behavior

I was fooling around online when I ran across an online group for plus size models. It was dedicated to fashion and fierceness for big girls… I joined immediately.

After uploading some glamorous shots of myself I forgot about the group, until one day I received an email from one of the members.

Hey… didn’t I meet you at SATELLITE?

I clicked into her profile and it was Dana! The Jill Scott look-alike we met a few weeks back. She and I both use instant messenger at our offices and we began chatting daily. We’d been chatting for about a week when she invited me to REWIND, another BBW party. I felt like with every new plus size girl I met, I was told of a new BBW party. So far I had heard of BBW parties in Connecticut, Philadelphia and of course there was DIVAS. I had just gone to SATELLITE and from there I was being invited to REWIND, I couldn’t help but say yes.

That Saturday I kept it simple: dark wash jeans with rhinestone embellishments on the back pockets and a black low cut top. I carried a vintage black clutch and pulled my hair back with a black and white polka-dot headband.

Dana was interesting to go out with. While Paige and Reese would jump right onto the dance floor, Dana seemed more concerned with playing it cool. She spent a good portion of the night standing against the wall with an aloof look on her face, taking dramatic sips of her tequila sunrise. I didnt feel comfortable on the dance floor alone, so I was at her mercy patiently waiting until she felt like letting loose.

Sometimes standing alone on or near a dance floor intensifies the fact that I don’t have a boyfriend. I love dancing and its painful to constantly hope that someone will want to dance with me. Standing there that night I felt the desire for a boyfriend strongly.

Finally Dana took a step onto the dance floor, I followed her and once we went out, there was no turning back. Again, the DJ was on fire, a welcome change from the old predictable mixes at DIVAS. We were working it, and as we rocked and swayed I looked up just as a group of extremely tall men walked into the club. I briefly locked eyes with one in a blue shirt and quickly looked away.

“Oh my Gosh!” I hissed into Dana’s ear, “there are the cutest, tallest guys behind you. We have to talk to them!” As the words came out of my mouth I confused myself because I don’t ever approach men.

Dana kept dancing and turned in a circle to get a good look at them, when she turned back to me her eyes lit up, “they are cute… which one do you want?”

“Blue Shirt” I said without hesitation.

My stomach was in knots as Dana danced over to one of Blue Shirt’s friends. They immediately started moving in sync which left me standing with my heart beating as I thought of the right thing to say.

I took a step closer to Blue Shirt.

“Hi!” I yelled over the music.

He just looked at me.

I wanted to die.

After a few seconds, his friend nudged him. “Oh, Hi!…sorry” he said with a laugh. I laughed too (for lack of anything better to do). His name was William and he was at REWIND with a bunch of his buddies from college as part of a bachelor party. He was at least 6 foot 5, with a slim frame and he was super cute.

As he spoke to me something happened; I felt like I was underwater, the club began to move in slow motion and as he leaned down and spoke into my ear between sips of Heineken, it took everything in me to focus on both my breathing, and what he was saying.

This is the guy I have been waiting to meet.

We danced and talked and danced some more. Eventually we realized we were off away from our friends. “I should get you back to your girl” he said.

Then he asked “Would it be okay if I called you sometime?”

I wanted to scream, YES YES Oh My Gosh, YES!

Instead I said “sure” and put my number in his phone.

I really wanted to ask for his number too, in case his phone got run over by a taxi or something before he had a chance to call me and I never saw him again, but I held back.

He found me at the end of the night gave me a kiss on the cheek and said he’d call me soon.

“Soon” could not come fast enough.

Something New….

After everything that happened, I was pleasantly surprised to see Paige’s name pop up on my caller ID. She called with last minute plans to check out a new BBW party, called SATELLITE. I had no idea there was more than one BBW party in NYC, so I happily agreed.

While DIVAS was a pretty diverse crowd, the pictures on the SATELLITE website made it clear that this crowd was predominately African-American. Paige always dates inter-racially and dates Black men exclusively, so she was giddy as we rode the train downtown.

We got off in a trendy area of Manhattan that neither of us was familiar with. As we turned corners trying to find our way, Paige noticed a full figured girl with big curly hair walking ahead of us. “Excuse me!” she called out before I cold stop her “Are you going to SATELLITE?”

The girl turned around, she looked a little like Jill Scott, “Yeah,” she replied casually “Its a few blocks from here.”

I let out a sigh of relief since Paige was making a million assumptions in asking her. We struck up a small conversation as we walked to the club together. Her name was Dana and she had been going to the SATELLITE party for a while.

We walked into the club and it was awesome! The DJ was way better than the old man who plays the music at DIVAS and there were no random contests and games. It was just good music, good drinks and a good time. Dana introduced us to a few people. We danced and traded numbers with some of the guys and although Paige’s pale skin brought a lot of extra attention to us, everyone was cool and fun.

We danced so hard that night, it was the best BBW party I had been to! We fell into the backseat of a cab exhausted and by the time I remembered that we hadn’t said goodbye to Dana, we were halfway home.

Unfortunately the SATELLITE party was only once a month, but I could not wait until the next one!