Can I share something with you?
Life is good right now… like REALLY good!
Are there things I wish were different? Absolutely. But the blessings in my life are so abundant that I’m FINALLY starting to understand all that stuff the elders say in church like “I can’t complain, He’s been too good!” or “I’m glad I don’t look like what I’ve been though…” (anybody else grow up hearing that stuff? haha)
Right now, my focus is 100% on gratitude. I am thankful everyday for the things I have and the things that are on the way.
That being said– as a single girl there’s nothing like a wedding to make you feel a little… restless.
My cousin William got married in Mexico last week. Here’s what I wore:
Earlier this month I moved into my dream apartment (yes, there’s an apartment tour coming, don’t worry). Because of the move, I cancelled a LOT of my travel plans but there was no way I was going to miss William II’s wedding.
So, the morning after my Tedx talk, my Mom and I hopped on the plane to Mexico. You can watch the video below to see our trip and some additional personal updates from me.
Usually when I attend weddings, I’m close to the bride so I’m watching things from her perspective. This year I’ve been to two weddings where I was closer to the groom. Watching the wedding as a friend of the groom can be fascinating, so after the video keep reading as I share 5 Thing I Learned from my Cousins Wedding
Lesson One: Watch the Throne
The reason I’m fond of my cousin William is that he’s bold and laid back at the same time. When someone doesn’t always speak, its best to watch what they do. If you’re watching a groom during his wedding weekend, you’ll learn a lot.
My cousin made sure all of us were happy and having a great time all weekend. He also kept a loving and watchful eye on three specific people: his fiance, Erika, his Mom (my aunt) and his son William III. In any given moment it was never about him… it was always about them.
Sometimes when you watch the throne, you’ll notice a man is always sitting there. Sometimes when you watch the throne, you’ll notice that’s where he seats the people who are precious to him.
Lesson Two: Life Comes at You Fast
My new cousin Erika is a boss, she’s a hairstylist who runs her own business and has loyal clients in LA. We were chatting over dinner about how we both quit our 9-5 office jobs so that we could chase our dreams. She casually mentioned that she remembers watching the “higher ups” at her old company taking their kids on beach vacations during the winter while the employees were stuck in the office barely making it.
The minute she said it I got chills… I looked at her and said:
“Wait a minute– ten years ago you watched your boss take his kids on beach vacations in winter. Now here YOU are taking YOUR kids on a beach vacation in winter… GIRL!”
Life comes at you fast… and that’s good news!
There are so many things I have now that I used to pray for. There are things Erika has now that she used to pray for. I’m grateful in advance for the things I’m praying for now… good and better things are always on the way!
Lesson Three: Mute R. Kelly
This is just a note to myself for the future.
Whenever I start planning a wedding I must tell the DJ that R. Kelly is NOT to be played.
Between the wedding reception and my aunts 90th birthday party in LA a few days later, I heard more R. Kelly music than a little bit.
I’ll be the first to admit that R. Kelly writes perfect songs to dance to and it’s hard to let a good bop go… but R.Kelly is nasty and each time his music was played half the crowd would sit down and refuse to dance and the other half was confused about why no one else was dancing.
It’s not anyone’s fault that the DJ played awesome songs written by a sick individual and it is clearly an easy thing to overlook or not even think about.
But I think it’s important to be intentional with DJ’s and tell them not to play R.Kelly’s music (in the same way you’d specify no cursing) because it makes people uncomfortable. *shrugs*
Lesson Four: “The One” has to be Fun
The day after Erika and WIll got married, they went riding on ATV’s in the sand dunes and got all dirty together. Erika is a glam girl, so when I saw the pics of her hugged up on her new hubby with sand all over her face, it was adorable!
I’ve definitely dated people who were less adventurous than me… I wont be doing that anymore haha
Lesson Five: Love is still a Thing
My parents have been married over 40 years.
Having a good relationship model is a blessing, but it can sometimes feel like I grew up with a unicorn in my home (i.e. something people have never seen or don’t think exists). I walk around with an idea of this unicorn type of relationship because that’s what my parents have. But when I take my unicorn beliefs into the dating world, it can feel like I’m the only believer.
Sometimes I get nervous that the rock solid, team us type of love isn’t a thing anymore.
So glad Will and Erika proved me wrong.