I’ve heard it said that humans have more than five senses. Along with sight, touch, taste, smell and hearing there are things like balance and temperature. One additional sense that has always fascinated me is the sense of knowing when someone is looking at you.
We’ve all had that moment where we feel someones eyes on us before we actually see them looking. Or we suddenly look up instinctively only to find someone staring right at us.
Of course, if we’re not interested in the person who’s eyes are locked on us, this can be creepy. But for those of us who are single and looking, these instincts can come in pretty handy. The problem is knowing what do do with them….
Sunday afternoon as I was leaving the gym, I felt one of the trainers looking at me from the moment I walked out of the women’s locker room. At least, I thought he was looking at me, but I wasn’t sure. Actually, I was sure but as I’ve discussed before being a plus size princess in a gym isn’t always the easiest thing. So, I convinced myself that the trainer couldn’t be looking at me. I pulled my sunglasses over my eyes, turned the music up in my headphones and walked by him with my eyes averted to the ground.
Last night, I was back at the gym for kickboxing. After class, I was speaking to one of the girls that I’ve become friendly with and the trainer from the day before approached her to say hello. They hugged, made a little small talk (apparently he’s her trainer) and then she turned to me. “Do you know CeCe?” she asked. I reached my hand out to shake his and he gave me a little grin. “I saw you yesterday… I tried to say hello to you, but you ignored me.”
My face burned with embarrassment. Not only had he seen me, but he was trying to speak. “Oh… I must have been in my own world,” I lied.
He nodded, “Yeah, I guess so– you had your sunglasses on and everything, so I was like ‘okay, nevermind'”
Even though I knew that my insecurities had kept me from making eye contact, the trainer didn’t. From his perspective I was pretty sure I came off as a snobby b*tch, which was not my intention.
A lot of times people ask me about dating in the city and one of the main things I suggest is eye contact.
To be honest, eye contact is easier said than done, but looking someone in the eyes can be the catalyst for connections galore! (especially if you follow up with a smile).
I thought what happened to me this weekend is a good example of potential missed opportunity. I’m not interested in the trainer, but imagine if I was. Or if the same scenario happened with a cute guy on the train, or a hot bartender. My senses were telling me that he was interested (even, if just to say hello) but I let my insecurities kill the moment!
If your sixth sense is telling you that someone has their eyes on you, look around and find out who it is. If you think they’re cute, don’t shy away… listen to your instincts and hopefully you wont make my mistakes!