Fitness

The Elephant In The Room… Is Me?!

May 2 2011 | CeCe Olisa

I had just sat down at my desk with my favorite 3pm snack. A Fuji apple (sliced) and a bag of 100 calorie popcorn (kettle corn, actually). I wiggle my mouse to awaken my screen and just as I toss a few popcorn kernels into my mouth one of my coworkers walks by my desk.

“Why are you eating THAT?!” she shrieks.

“What do you mean?” I ask slowly.

“That’s not good for you…” she wags her finger.

“Its 100 calories,” I reply flatly.

This particular coworker has been watching my weight loss like a hawk since January.

“You’re doing good!” she’ll tell me when she sees my healthy lunches. Of course, she thinks she can understand what I’m going through since she struggled to get from a size 8 to a size 5 last year. And now here she is standing at my desk policing my food. I stare blankly at my computer screen hoping she’ll leave me and my 3pm snack alone. She hesitates, realizing that she’d made me uncomfortable. “I guess its not that bad, oh you have an apple too? You’re doing good!” she says before scurrying away.

A few days later, as I was getting ready to leave the office for the day, the woman who cleans our offices at night cornered me in the bathroom. She doesn’t speak english and I’m decent at spanish, but from what I gathered she said you’re getting very skinny! That’s good! I notice you keep fruit at your desk… the apples are good for you, but no more bananas… they have too much sugar!!!!

I gave her a quick “gracias” for her compliments and advice before slipping out of the bathroom as quickly as possible.

Weight is a tricky thing. If I were super skinny people wouldn’t hesitate to voice their observations about my body. How many times have we heard comments like “you’re so skinny” or “I see you eat, but where does it go?” when slender people are around. On the other hand, I’ve never heard someone say “I know that slice of pizza is going right to your midsection!” when they see me eating.

But once its clear that I’m losing weight (or trying to) everyone seems to have an opinion on what I should or shouldn’t be doing, eating or drinking. Suddenly everyone is a wealth of knowledge on me and my body. Almost as if they’ve been biting their tongues and now that I’ve acknowledged that I’m overweight, they’re letting out a collective sigh of relief. Its almost as if they’re saying I’m glad she’s finally doing something… I thought I was the only one who noticed!

Until now, people pretended that my fat wasnt there. They never comment on my body one way or another. They even censored themselves from saying certain things to protect me or not hurt my feelings. Before I started losing weight, my size was like the pervorbial “Elephant in the room”. I don’t mind when people observe my weight loss, it makes me feel good and helps to keep me motivated, but there’s a difference between that and people monitoring me. That makes me feel uncomfortable and not supported. It also makes me feel like I’m on display.

A note from Swimsuits For All: Swimming is a great way to workout, especially in the summer. There are plenty of stores that offer plus size swimwear so you look your best!

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69 responses on “The Elephant In The Room… Is Me?!

  1. kari_serrano@hotmail.com

    I totally get what your feeling. I’ve been told things like that before, Losing weight is a very personal journey not only in terms of how we do it or what works for each person but on how every individual deal with the changes that are happening in their lives.I’ve been living in an European country for three years and one of the things I like about it is that there is far less interest in one’s size or fitness status than in my mid-size hometown.It’s a break from explaining every move to * good willing* persons about your journey.

    It’s the first time I write you, I like your blog, Good luck ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Lousia

    Mmm, that’s not cool. I don’t think they are saying what you think they are but I totally understand why you would feel that way. Big hugs & YAY for you!

    Also, miss you and will email soon – life is far to craaazy and it’s no excuse.

    xx

  3. louisa@everythingisedible.com

    Mmm, that’s not cool. I don’t think they are saying what you think they are but I totally understand why you would feel that way. Big hugs & YAY for you!
    Also, miss you and will email soon – life is far to craaazy and it’s no excuse.

    xx

  4. Karina

    I totally get what your feeling. I’ve been told things like that before, Losing weight is a very personal journey not only in terms of how we do it or what works for each person but on how every individual deal with the changes that are happening in their lives.
    I’ve been living in an European country for three years and one of the things I like about it is that there is far less interest in one’s size or fitness status than in my mid-size hometown.It’s a break from explaining every move to * good willing* persons about your journey.

    It’s the first time I write you, I like your blog, Good luck ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. Christina

    I love what Karina said because I was just talking about this with a friend from Germany. As Americans we have this obsession with a) our own appearance and b) everyone else’s appearance. I lived in England for 4 months when I did independent study and it’s amazing that – while weight is still tabloid fodder – in your day to day life there is very little personal criticism and critiquing about it. I work at a coffee shop and two weeks ago this old guy (one of my regulars) came in and somehow we got started on the topic of weight loss. I told him that my sophomore year of college I lost 40lbs, and do you know what his response was? “Well how did you gain it all back?” I was gob smacked that he would say that. I’m not the tiniest person, but if I lost 40lbs I’d certainly be underweight and no where near healthy or fit. My reply was, “I didn’t. I gained a lot of weight my freshman year and I lost it my sophomore year.” He then started berating me, saying, “How could you let yourself get that way? Didn’t people tell you you were getting fat?” I was incredulous! He’s one of only a handful of people who have spoken to me like this, and every time it throws me off. It was certainly the meanest thing said to me all year so far.

    Anyways…just wanted to get that off my chest! But the reasons you give here are the exact reasons I don’t tell people my healthy-habit goals…we won’t call them weight loss goals because, although it’d be interesting to see myself as a size 2, all I really want is to be the healthiest and happiest me that I can be without getting hung up on the number on the scale (or on a tag). It’s a weird dilemma to face…wanting to be happy as you are, but still striving for something that you know will change you, but as my momma says, “The only constant in life is change.”

    Thanks for your post! You’re so inspiring ๐Ÿ™‚ x

  6. xtana.1337@gmail.com

    I love what Karina said because I was just talking about this with a friend from Germany. As Americans we have this obsession with a) our own appearance and b) everyone else’s appearance. I lived in England for 4 months when I did independent study and it’s amazing that – while weight is still tabloid fodder – in your day to day life there is very little personal criticism and critiquing about it. I work at a coffee shop and two weeks ago this old guy (one of my regulars) came in and somehow we got started on the topic of weight loss. I told him that my sophomore year of college I lost 40lbs, and do you know what his response was? “Well how did you gain it all back?” I was gob smacked that he would say that. I’m not the tiniest person, but if I lost 40lbs I’d certainly be underweight and no where near healthy or fit. My reply was, “I didn’t. I gained a lot of weight my freshman year and I lost it my sophomore year.” He then started berating me, saying, “How could you let yourself get that way? Didn’t people tell you you were getting fat?” I was incredulous! He’s one of only a handful of people who have spoken to me like this, and every time it throws me off. It was certainly the meanest thing said to me all year so far.
    Anyways…just wanted to get that off my chest! But the reasons you give here are the exact reasons I don’t tell people my healthy-habit goals…we won’t call them weight loss goals because, although it’d be interesting to see myself as a size 2, all I really want is to be the healthiest and happiest me that I can be without getting hung up on the number on the scale (or on a tag). It’s a weird dilemma to face…wanting to be happy as you are, but still striving for something that you know will change you, but as my momma says, “The only constant in life is change.”

    Thanks for your post! You’re so inspiring ๐Ÿ™‚ x

  7. Knight

    I’ve been noticing lately that society in general has developed an idea that talking health is interesting which I guess is good but now everyone has an opinion on everything and they all want to tell you what it is. It’s a craze of some sort.

  8. carlyrenea@aol.com

    I’ve been noticing lately that society in general has developed an idea that talking health is interesting which I guess is good but now everyone has an opinion on everything and they all want to tell you what it is. It’s a craze of some sort.

  9. ShoeJunkie

    UUUGGHHHH I HATE when people act like the food police. I know that people have good intentions but it’s still really annoying. I’m on a weight loss journey too and I’ve definitely had to make it clear that I do not tolerate that. Let me eat what I want, when I want and let me figure out what’s best for ME.
    You know it’s funny, I once read a comment on another blog a long time ago that said “Fat people know more about losing weight than anybody” and at first I thought that statement was ridiculous, but it’s true. Any person who is overweight probably knows more about calorie counting, good foods vs. bad foods, which diets work, what’s healthy, etc. more than anyone because we’ve probably tried it a million times before. So why do people feel the need to give their two cents on what goes into my mouth? Just let me figure it out and if I have any questions I’ll ask them.

  10. tytayl@gmail.com

    UUUGGHHHH I HATE when people act like the food police. I know that people have good intentions but it’s still really annoying. I’m on a weight loss journey too and I’ve definitely had to make it clear that I do not tolerate that. Let me eat what I want, when I want and let me figure out what’s best for ME.You know it’s funny, I once read a comment on another blog a long time ago that said “Fat people know more about losing weight than anybody” and at first I thought that statement was ridiculous, but it’s true. Any person who is overweight probably knows more about calorie counting, good foods vs. bad foods, which diets work, what’s healthy, etc. more than anyone because we’ve probably tried it a million times before. So why do people feel the need to give their two cents on what goes into my mouth? Just let me figure it out and if I have any questions I’ll ask them.

  11. Kas

    I am SOOOOO with you on this!!!

    What I eat, when I excercise— It’s MY business!

    Please feel free to tell me it looks like I’ve lost more weight or whatever, but I DO NOT need to have anyone ‘police’ me!!

    TY– I needed that vent!

  12. gooberdog@netscape.com

    I am SOOOOO with you on this!!!
    What I eat, when I excercise— It’s MY business!

    Please feel free to tell me it looks like I’ve lost more weight or whatever, but I DO NOT need to have anyone ‘police’ me!!

    TY– I needed that vent!

  13. Roxanne

    I come from a family where people often comment on people’s weight and appearance. Often. “Did you see so and so — oh they’ve put on weight” or “so and so looks old” or “she better be careful” or “she’s getting fact” or “You’re not skinny anymore” or “when did you get that belly” — I could go on. It’s horrible. Consequently, I would never comment on what a person is eating or even that they’ve lost weight. If I want to compliment someone I tell him/her they look nice. That’s it. Or, I like your dress. Whatever. Compliments don’t have to be specific or reference weight loss or gain. If you have anything to say about someone’s food other than “that looks or smells good” than you probably shouldn’t say it. I don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. (I get that enough at home).

  14. julia@oldmoneymusic.com

    I come from a family where people often comment on people’s weight and appearance. Often. “Did you see so and so — oh they’ve put on weight” or “so and so looks old” or “she better be careful” or “she’s getting fact” or “You’re not skinny anymore” or “when did you get that belly” — I could go on. It’s horrible. Consequently, I would never comment on what a person is eating or even that they’ve lost weight. If I want to compliment someone I tell him/her they look nice. That’s it. Or, I like your dress. Whatever. Compliments don’t have to be specific or reference weight loss or gain. If you have anything to say about someone’s food other than “that looks or smells good” than you probably shouldn’t say it. I don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. (I get that enough at home).

  15. Monique

    I find it funny that people never have anything to say to you or about you until you start losing weight. They act as if they are the ones going through the journey and are experts. If you were eating a Reese’s cup as a treat, she shouldn’t have anything to say.

  16. lmreese@gmail.com

    I find it funny that people never have anything to say to you or about you until you start losing weight. They act as if they are the ones going through the journey and are experts. If you were eating a Reese’s cup as a treat, she shouldn’t have anything to say.

  17. Buddahkitty

    I hear this! I did a 5k mud run (with obstacle courses) this weekend, the first thing people do when I was so proud of accomplishing this is check out my body. As to inspect if I am in fact capable of doing so. I’m not in the best shape, but i still do the runs, is that a sin? apparently so. The sad part is, the people who do it, I don’t think they would finish themselves.

  18. ipurr@me.com

    I hear this! I did a 5k mud run (with obstacle courses) this weekend, the first thing people do when I was so proud of accomplishing this is check out my body. As to inspect if I am in fact capable of doing so. I’m not in the best shape, but i still do the runs, is that a sin? apparently so. The sad part is, the people who do it, I don’t think they would finish themselves.

  19. Sara

    OMG people like that make me want to punch them in the throat! So rude! Okay, maybe that’s a little violent, I’ve never actually punched someone (FYI!), but I’d mentally sock it to ’em!

    I too am a plus sized woman who is working on her health and lifestyle choices and it’s a struggle. What I hate also are people who make comments about healthy food and what I should try and then they go and get a Big Mac themselves because they are tiny….uh, hypocrite much? Just because someone is small doesn’t mean they are healthy either unless they follow that lifestyle themselves. So irritating.

  20. wrappedinhappiness@gmail.com

    OMG people like that make me want to punch them in the throat! So rude! Okay, maybe that’s a little violent, I’ve never actually punched someone (FYI!), but I’d mentally sock it to ’em!
    I too am a plus sized woman who is working on her health and lifestyle choices and it’s a struggle. What I hate also are people who make comments about healthy food and what I should try and then they go and get a Big Mac themselves because they are tiny….uh, hypocrite much? Just because someone is small doesn’t mean they are healthy either unless they follow that lifestyle themselves. So irritating.

  21. Shana

    I am also trying to lose weight. And I also love the compliments I’ve been getting now that it’s finally noticable. However, when it comes to advice, I wish everyone would just mind their own business. After all, I don’t stand over their lunches and analyze what they are eating. I get a lot of questions because I’m following a program and people are curious…and that’s fine. I’m happy to tell anyone what they want to know. But don’t stand there and say things like “Don’t eat that”. It makes me very uncomfortable.

    Oh and the thing about the bananas? Yeah, my weight loss counselor told me that the other day. The way I look at it…no one ever got fat from eating bananas.

  22. shanamaimone@aol.com

    I am also trying to lose weight. And I also love the compliments I’ve been getting now that it’s finally noticable. However, when it comes to advice, I wish everyone would just mind their own business. After all, I don’t stand over their lunches and analyze what they are eating. I get a lot of questions because I’m following a program and people are curious…and that’s fine. I’m happy to tell anyone what they want to know. But don’t stand there and say things like “Don’t eat that”. It makes me very uncomfortable.
    Oh and the thing about the bananas? Yeah, my weight loss counselor told me that the other day. The way I look at it…no one ever got fat from eating bananas.

  23. Kemi

    I hate when people do things like that. I make it a point NOT to give any type of advice unless I am specifically asked. As for the comments, I generally don’t make those either, I’ve always looked at from the point of view that I don’t need to tell anyone that it looks like they are losing or gaining weight. I know its confidence boosting to most people but really what’s the point? I’m just not one of those people, period. I’m more likely to tell someone if they are looking nice/pretty/insert other adjectives here in general.

  24. nokiozbeauty@yahoo.com

    I hate when people do things like that. I make it a point NOT to give any type of advice unless I am specifically asked. As for the comments, I generally don’t make those either, I’ve always looked at from the point of view that I don’t need to tell anyone that it looks like they are losing or gaining weight. I know its confidence boosting to most people but really what’s the point? I’m just not one of those people, period. I’m more likely to tell someone if they are looking nice/pretty/insert other adjectives here in general.

  25. Danielle

    People need to keep their opinions to themselves. I had some rail thin anorexic looking chick come up to me in an aerobic class to say that she has seen me here and that I do so well in class and to keep it up. Although they are words of encouragement, and I am sure she felt better about herself for “paying it forward” I would have rather her mind her own business. To me it was rude, and discouraging.

  26. shyzahkitty@gmail.com

    People need to keep their opinions to themselves. I had some rail thin anorexic looking chick come up to me in an aerobic class to say that she has seen me here and that I do so well in class and to keep it up. Although they are words of encouragement, and I am sure she felt better about herself for “paying it forward” I would have rather her mind her own business. To me it was rude, and discouraging.

  27. Samantha

    I know what you mean. I moved from a small town in OH to St. Louis, MO. My father recently died and we made the trip back home for the funeral. I have been putting on weight for the past couple of years, but in the past few months have really gotten on track to lose it. While at the funeral an old coworker approaches me and says, “you used to be so skinny, I’m sure you can lose the weight.” I found out later that my mom had been talking to her about the diet I am trying to stick to. Comments like that make me feel like my big fat butt is the center of attention and I begin to get descouraged. I don’t lack will power, I lack the ability to overlook the idiots that want to talk to you about how fat I am. It didn’t help that she probably only weighs 100 pounds soaking wet. Who is she to tell me anything? It’s not like she’s ever had to work at losing weight, this is a person who eats whatever they want and never gains a pound……… Good for her, but she needs to learn to keep her mouth shut. Some people have no manners.

  28. pookyone2003@yahoo.com

    I know what you mean. I moved from a small town in OH to St. Louis, MO. My father recently died and we made the trip back home for the funeral. I have been putting on weight for the past couple of years, but in the past few months have really gotten on track to lose it. While at the funeral an old coworker approaches me and says, “you used to be so skinny, I’m sure you can lose the weight.” I found out later that my mom had been talking to her about the diet I am trying to stick to. Comments like that make me feel like my big fat butt is the center of attention and I begin to get descouraged. I don’t lack will power, I lack the ability to overlook the idiots that want to talk to you about how fat I am. It didn’t help that she probably only weighs 100 pounds soaking wet. Who is she to tell me anything? It’s not like she’s ever had to work at losing weight, this is a person who eats whatever they want and never gains a pound……… Good for her, but she needs to learn to keep her mouth shut. Some people have no manners.

  29. Denise

    Cece, I think you were really graceful about it. People do the same thing to me at work. “Why are you eating , I thought you were on a diet?!” they ask. My response? “‘Cause I’m a grown ass woman! Have a good day!” And keep walking…

  30. chunky2803@yahoo.com

    Cece, I think you were really graceful about it. People do the same thing to me at work. “Why are you eating , I thought you were on a diet?!” they ask. My response? “‘Cause I’m a grown ass woman! Have a good day!” And keep walking…

  31. Clara

    Wow, Cece, I’d just be proud knowing that you have one fuji apple, one mini-bag of kettle corn popcorn and a whole lot more manners than your co-worker. Maybe she’s lost a few pounds, but she certainly hasn’t gained any class.

  32. cailinck@yahoo.com

    Wow, Cece, I’d just be proud knowing that you have one fuji apple, one mini-bag of kettle corn popcorn and a whole lot more manners than your co-worker. Maybe she’s lost a few pounds, but she certainly hasn’t gained any class.

  33. IntrigueMe

    Oh, I absolutely hate that. It’s actually one of the reasons I’m hesitant to lose weight– because I don’t want to draw attention. Every time someone sees me eating something healthy at work they think they have a right to comment- as if I usually walk around stuffing my face with Doritos or something. Where the hell do people get off?!

  34. intriguemeblogs@gmail.com

    Oh, I absolutely hate that. It’s actually one of the reasons I’m hesitant to lose weight– because I don’t want to draw attention. Every time someone sees me eating something healthy at work they think they have a right to comment- as if I usually walk around stuffing my face with Doritos or something. Where the hell do people get off?!

  35. Veronica

    I’ve just started reading your blog a couple of months ago and love it! I myself have struggled with weight and health issues for years now. I’m on blood pressure meds and I am working slowly to get off those drugs by watching what I eat and started exercising here and there (every little bit is good for reducing the bp). Slowly but surely the pounds are dropping (btw – I used an old pair of pants as my measure of weight loss. I can get back into them again! lol)

    I get what you’re saying. I hear the same kind of comments, oh you’ve been losing weight; keep up the good work, etc. Then, there are those other people that just have to put in their 2 cents on what else you should be doing, ‘don’t eat that, eat this instead.’ or ‘ If you eat that, it’s gonna sabotage all your work.’ My personal favorites are comments from family members who think a good put down is the best motivator. Augh! I wish people would just keep to themselves. Sometimes instead of motivating, they really make you feel worse. I’ve resorted to just saying Thank you and then rolling my eyes after the offender is gone.

  36. Bea

    Ok so 2 years ago I decided I had, had enough with my weight just forever climbing on the scale. I have in 2 years managed through various experiments to lose about 40 pounds. Those who know me well can tell those who don’t have no idea because I am still well over 300 pounds. When a few people started noticing they gave compliments and then start the “watching” of everything I did and ate. When the advice started, I would just smile and nod and not say anything. I no longer do that if they want to give advice I start asking them about all of the complexities of diet and nutrition that I can think of and I also ask them about their results. Not overly aggressive and most definitely not passive but asserting myself and making it clear that if they think they can just all of the sudden comment and give out advise they had better have something new to say. Let’s face I think that most people who have struggled with their weight probably have more knowledge about health and diet than the size 2 who has never had to wonder why after eating a balanced diet and working out hard they are still the same size……

  37. beahunter@yahoo.com

    Ok so 2 years ago I decided I had, had enough with my weight just forever climbing on the scale. I have in 2 years managed through various experiments to lose about 40 pounds. Those who know me well can tell those who don’t have no idea because I am still well over 300 pounds. When a few people started noticing they gave compliments and then start the “watching” of everything I did and ate. When the advice started, I would just smile and nod and not say anything. I no longer do that if they want to give advice I start asking them about all of the complexities of diet and nutrition that I can think of and I also ask them about their results. Not overly aggressive and most definitely not passive but asserting myself and making it clear that if they think they can just all of the sudden comment and give out advise they had better have something new to say. Let’s face I think that most people who have struggled with their weight probably have more knowledge about health and diet than the size 2 who has never had to wonder why after eating a balanced diet and working out hard they are still the same size……

  38. B.Good

    Yeah, I rarely “voice” when I’m working on my weight loss (or any form of “self-improvement”, for that matter). I know I have my ups and downs, and people can’t help to comment on them once they know about it.

  39. abgood@gmail.com

    Yeah, I rarely “voice” when I’m working on my weight loss (or any form of “self-improvement”, for that matter). I know I have my ups and downs, and people can’t help to comment on them once they know about it.

  40. Lolli

    When people said things like that to me when I was losing weight it made me feel good too, and they tried to tell me somethings I were shoveling into my mouth were bad. It hurt because I felt like I had to please these people. I had to think to myself, “Why am I losing this weight?” Am I losing it for me? And so on. It took me a while to be comfortable enough with myself to ignore these people and only listen to the ones that mattered, like my closest friends and people I know that were trying to encourage me and not judge me. Eat what you want because we only get a little time to enjoy ourselves. ๐Ÿ™‚

  41. lollilove@gmail.com

    When people said things like that to me when I was losing weight it made me feel good too, and they tried to tell me somethings I were shoveling into my mouth were bad. It hurt because I felt like I had to please these people. I had to think to myself, “Why am I losing this weight?” Am I losing it for me? And so on. It took me a while to be comfortable enough with myself to ignore these people and only listen to the ones that mattered, like my closest friends and people I know that were trying to encourage me and not judge me. Eat what you want because we only get a little time to enjoy ourselves. ๐Ÿ™‚

  42. Sherry

    People can be so insensitive. If you take the time to listen to your body, you can find your healthy weight….and you don’t have to spend your last dime on some weight loss scheme or drug being pushed by the media. More often than not, those gimmicks do not work, and we are just making those pushing this agenda richer. And the drugs being sold to help us lose weight often cause much more serious health problems than just being yourself. Just because someone is not a skinny minnie does not mean that they are not beautiful or healthy. We need to remember that 30 years ago being a Big Girl was most desired. Bigger girls are generally happier, healthier and more able to conceive and carry a baby….What made the tables turn? The media. The question is why?
    I agree with Lilli, We only get to do this life one time, Why not be happy with who we are and enjoy it!

  43. Ashley

    I HATE that when I say I’m trying to eat healthy everyone takes it upon themselves to “police” what I’m eating. Maybe I don’t eat healthy every second of the day, but I also don’t stuff my face on the regular! I hate feeling unhealthy when I know I’m not completely unhealthy. Or maybe once or twice I’ve “fallen off” of a diet by eating A cookie or brownie because my manager insists on bringing in any type of sweet she can find, but I don’t go overboard! Just because I am heavy doesn’t mean I go home and devour all the contents in my house every night. It basically just means that my metabolism sucks! I go to the gym probably 3-5 nights a week now. I run on the treadmill, bust my hump on the eliptical, and even lift weights like the big boys do. Do I see any results? Hmmm…no.

    I have so much energy in me! If you were to look at me, one would think, “she probably sits on her couch every night and does nothing”. I hate that kind of judgment. Why just because I’m plus sized does it mean that I’m unhealthy. So I started Googling (aka – my personal answer wizard) a bunch of information about the possibility of being healthy and plus sized all at the same time. I came across this website by this woman named Debra Mazda. Her website is shapelygirlfitness.com. It got me thinking. I can still be healthy, and I can still be active, and I could still very well be plus sized. Check out the page! I’m spreading the word only because I believe in it! Good luck with the weight loss! I’m sure you’re doing great! Never get discouraged!!!

  44. a-rip2105@comcast.net

    I HATE that when I say I’m trying to eat healthy everyone takes it upon themselves to “police” what I’m eating. Maybe I don’t eat healthy every second of the day, but I also don’t stuff my face on the regular! I hate feeling unhealthy when I know I’m not completely unhealthy. Or maybe once or twice I’ve “fallen off” of a diet by eating A cookie or brownie because my manager insists on bringing in any type of sweet she can find, but I don’t go overboard! Just because I am heavy doesn’t mean I go home and devour all the contents in my house every night. It basically just means that my metabolism sucks! I go to the gym probably 3-5 nights a week now. I run on the treadmill, bust my hump on the eliptical, and even lift weights like the big boys do. Do I see any results? Hmmm…no.
    I have so much energy in me! If you were to look at me, one would think, “she probably sits on her couch every night and does nothing”. I hate that kind of judgment. Why just because I’m plus sized does it mean that I’m unhealthy. So I started Googling (aka – my personal answer wizard) a bunch of information about the possibility of being healthy and plus sized all at the same time. I came across this website by this woman named Debra Mazda. Her website is shapelygirlfitness.com. It got me thinking. I can still be healthy, and I can still be active, and I could still very well be plus sized. Check out the page! I’m spreading the word only because I believe in it! Good luck with the weight loss! I’m sure you’re doing great! Never get discouraged!!!

  45. Jennifer

    I have felt this way so many times, it’s too many to count! As I continue to lose weight, I feel like people judge me even more when I indulge now and then. Maybe it’s because my weight loss has slowed, and I’m really just judging myself harder. Sometimes I think the emotions we put on others, are really reflections of how we view ourselves.

  46. jenniferdome@gmail.com

    I have felt this way so many times, it’s too many to count! As I continue to lose weight, I feel like people judge me even more when I indulge now and then. Maybe it’s because my weight loss has slowed, and I’m really just judging myself harder. Sometimes I think the emotions we put on others, are really reflections of how we view ourselves.

  47. Eve

    The other day I was having a conversation with my brother’s girlfriend and she was telling me about this girl at her school (who was well plus size, so I hear) and she laughed as she told me, “You know Jack? He calls her the meatball! ‘Coz she’s so round!” and giggled away.
    I sort or smiled along with her because I didn’t know what else to do. I’m a size 18 and I’ve seen pics of this girl and I’m guessing she’s a 20, or a 22? Not hugely bigger than me. And here was my friend laughing at her .
    It’s like the people around me (except my mother, that’s a whole new story) ignore the ‘elephant in the room’ so much I don’t know to be miffed that they’re not considering me sometimes (like complaining about me not wanting to go swimming at the beach in summer – I’m just not comfortable in a swimsuit with all my skinny, pretty friends) or be thankful that they see beyond the fat and like me for who I am.

    It’s a very fine line and I’ve come to accept that people aren’t going to know what crosses it or not. But I definitely feel, for me anyhow, that comments about a person’s body, skinny or not, require a certain level of friendship. Especially when it comes to advice or things that aren’t direct complements.

    On a side note, I love this blog!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  48. Eve

    The other day I was having a conversation with my brother’s girlfriend and she was telling me about this girl at her school (who was well plus size, so I hear) and she laughed as she told me, “You know Jack? He calls her the meatball! ‘Coz she’s so round!” and giggled away.
    I sort or smiled along with her because I didn’t know what else to do. I’m a size 18 and I’ve seen pics of this girl and I’m guessing she’s a 20, or a 22? Not hugely bigger than me. And here was my friend laughing at her .
    It’s like the people around me (except my mother, that’s a whole new story) ignore the ‘elephant in the room’ so much I don’t know to be miffed that they’re not considering me sometimes (like complaining about me not wanting to go swimming at the beach in summer – I’m just not comfortable in a swimsuit with all my skinny, pretty friends) or be thankful that they see beyond the fat and like me for who I am.

    It’s a very fine line and I’ve come to accept that people aren’t going to know what crosses it or not. But I definitely feel, for me anyhow, that comments about a person’s body, skinny or not, require a certain level of friendship. Especially when it comes to advice or things that aren’t direct complements.

    On a side note, I love this blog!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  49. eve.double91@gmail.com

    The other day I was having a conversation with my brother’s girlfriend and she was telling me about this girl at her school (who was well plus size, so I hear) and she laughed as she told me, “You know Jack? He calls her the meatball! ‘Coz she’s so round!” and giggled away.I sort or smiled along with her because I didn’t know what else to do. I’m a size 18 and I’ve seen pics of this girl and I’m guessing she’s a 20, or a 22? Not hugely bigger than me. And here was my friend laughing at her .
    It’s like the people around me (except my mother, that’s a whole new story) ignore the ‘elephant in the room’ so much I don’t know to be miffed that they’re not considering me sometimes (like complaining about me not wanting to go swimming at the beach in summer – I’m just not comfortable in a swimsuit with all my skinny, pretty friends) or be thankful that they see beyond the fat and like me for who I am.

    It’s a very fine line and I’ve come to accept that people aren’t going to know what crosses it or not. But I definitely feel, for me anyhow, that comments about a person’s body, skinny or not, require a certain level of friendship. Especially when it comes to advice or things that aren’t direct complements.

    On a side note, I love this blog!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  50. eve.double91@gmail.com

    The other day I was having a conversation with my brother’s girlfriend and she was telling me about this girl at her school (who was well plus size, so I hear) and she laughed as she told me, “You know Jack? He calls her the meatball! ‘Coz she’s so round!” and giggled away.I sort or smiled along with her because I didn’t know what else to do. I’m a size 18 and I’ve seen pics of this girl and I’m guessing she’s a 20, or a 22? Not hugely bigger than me. And here was my friend laughing at her .
    It’s like the people around me (except my mother, that’s a whole new story) ignore the ‘elephant in the room’ so much I don’t know to be miffed that they’re not considering me sometimes (like complaining about me not wanting to go swimming at the beach in summer – I’m just not comfortable in a swimsuit with all my skinny, pretty friends) or be thankful that they see beyond the fat and like me for who I am.

    It’s a very fine line and I’ve come to accept that people aren’t going to know what crosses it or not. But I definitely feel, for me anyhow, that comments about a person’s body, skinny or not, require a certain level of friendship. Especially when it comes to advice or things that aren’t direct complements.

    On a side note, I love this blog!! ๐Ÿ™‚

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