Dating

Women are… Weird

December 29 2009 | CeCe Olisa

A couple of you have emailed me asking about Robert and what’s going on with us. I thought I’d share a story from the other night, but before I do I wanted to give a small update:

If you follow me on twitter, you know that while I do date other men, Robert is the main guy that I see.

There have been so many frustrating/cute/funny/awkward/sweet moments that I’ve wanted to share with you, but I’ve made the decision to keep the details of “Robert & Celeste” to myself (this is hard because I tell you guys everything!) I will offer small glimpses into our relationship when I can and eventually I will tell our whole story here, but right now I need to let things unfold without feeling any pressure.

Hopefully that makes sense. Now on to the story!

Two weeks ago I was Roberts “+1” for his cousins birthday party. As we walked along the cobblestone streets of the MeatPacking district, Robert gave me the rundown of who I would be meeting. “My cousin, his girlfriend and I think some of her sorority sisters will be there. I met them last year, they’re cool” he said, leading me across the street.

We walked into the club and found the coat check. I casually slipped out of my coat and from the approving look I got from Robert (and the random bouncer in the corner) I knew that the black mini-dress and ankle boots I was wearing were a good choice. I slipped my ruffled clutch under my left arm, slipped my right hand around Roberts arm and we made our way to the bar.

The place was pretty packed and Robert didn’t seem too concerned with finding his cousin right away, so we danced in our own little corner. While we were dancing a man, who I assumed was Roberts cousin, came and tapped Robert on the shoulder.

“Rob!” he yelled over the music. Robert turned around and the two of them immediately embraced. Then Robert leaned in to hug his cousins girlfriend and shake the hands of her three sorority sisters who were with them. They reintroduced themselves, “Yeah, I remember you guys from last year… did you cut your hair?” Robert asked as he shook the last girls hand.

“Yeah,” she responded smiling and touching her tresses.

Then Robert reached back and pulled me into the circle. At that moment, the smiles on the sorority sisters faces quickly faded.

“This is Celeste!” he said, letting his hand rest on my arm. Roberts cousin and his cousins girlfriend immediately reached out to shake my hand, but the sorority sisters just stared at me blankly. By the looks on their faces, it seemed that my presence with Robert was unexpected and unwelcome.

“Hi there…” I said giving them a small wave. They each gave me a curt “Hello.”

I tried not to let my confusion show on my face. Robert and his cousin went to get another round of drinks for us. I made small talk easily with his cousins girlfriend, but when I tried to engage the sorority sisters, I was met with half smiles and small nods. At one point I think one of the girls actually looked me up and down.

Robert and his cousin finally came back, at which point, the sorority sisters announced that they were going to go “look around”. The four of us spent the rest of the night dancing, drinking and having a really nice time. But I couldn’t shake the awful reception I got from those girls… is this what its like to date a desirable man?

Riding home in the cab with Robert, who was oblivious to the whole thing, I had to remind myself that random sorority girls in clubs don’t matter. But, sheesh… they really know how to ruin a girls night.

My Mother is a feminist who encourages women to uplift other women. I also grew up listening to the Spice Girls and kept the motto of “Girl Power” long after they went out of style. So, the idea of being cold towards another woman because of the man she’s with just doesn’t make sense to me. Maybe my size has shielded me from the jealousy that comes from having or being what another woman wants, but if this is what I’ve been missing… I’m really not interested.

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24 responses on “Women are… Weird

  1. Karla

    My impression is that one (or more) of them was hoping to score some time with him, and you were an unscheduled obstacle. That's their problem, not yours. Be thankful you aren't the type that needs to tear someone else down to make herself feel better.

    The fact that he was oblivious is also a good sign. If anything remotely meaningful had happened during their last encounter, he probably would've given you more details about them beforehand or some other sort of hint.

  2. Secretia

    Aren't all women jealous of each other at least a little bit, and don't we all wonder if "he" would choose us or "her" to make love to?

    Secretia

  3. Da_Kween

    That was so rude. I don't understand some women. They'll let a man ruin the innate sisterhood women should share…EVERY time.

    I agree with Karla…someone was probably excited to know he was coming and their face cracked and fell when he introduced you. Boo and Bye! Stay fab and remember that Girl Power creed…some of us still believe in that.

    Happy New Year! 🙂

  4. Big.Grrrl

    Yeah… you girl power them away from your date! I am sure they were just jealous…as interpreted by Karla.
    I am sure everyone has experienced moments like that, where some girl looks up and down at you – at least I have. So I´m totally with your "girls should stick together" thesis instead of making it even harder for the sisters around.

    Anyway…: I found you, because I googled and realized our blog names are quite similar. Have to admit that I started mine after yours though. But from Germany and with mainly fashion themes. So no competition 😉
    But I´ll keep following.
    Greetings from the other side of the Atlantic.

  5. Mike Lowrey

    I always seem to see things a lil differently.

    Was it jealously or were they just totally shocked that he brought someone.

    It could have been jealously….
    Or it could have been from their last meeting and kicking it with Robert they all got the notion that he didn't have a girl.

    What is weird is… how you guys go to meet up with his cousin, get there and then don't seem too interested for looking for him.
    It's usually the first thing someone would do.

    Also she must have made some impression on him that he remembered how her hair looked after meeting once a few months back.

    Just my take.

  6. Punky

    You definitely should've grabbed him and started making out with him while they were watching =) That's a sure fire way to get the point across to haters! haha

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