I was doing a quick run to the grocery store which meant I didn’t even bother getting dressed. I just tucked my pajama pants into my Uggs and threw on my wide collar black wool coat which still had a big bejeweled brooch on it from the night before.
As I stood in the dairy aisle deciding if I should try a new brand of Soy Milk, a very tall man with curly salt and pepper colored hair pushed his cart in between the refrigerator and me.
“That brooch is so big, you might need a bodyguard,” he said.
I smiled politely.
“You know, I am a bodyguard… in case you need one,” he winked.
I stared at him blankly.
“One other thing,” he said as he leaned in closer. “If anyone tells you you’re overweight, let me know and I’ll break their legs!”
I’m thinking of keeping copies of this in my purse to pass out when necessary.