In the craziness that is New York City Nightlife, is it possible to meet “Mr. Right”? The general consensus of my single girlfriends, plus size or not, is No.
But I would magnify that decision dramatically when it comes The Scene. While many of the plus size divas who attend these events seem to be open to love, the men who flock to the parties seem to view a plus size woman as a sexual fantasy, not a potential relationship.
So, what’s a girl who is looking for The One to do? I was brought up to expect certain things from a male who was interested in me. I am looking for courtship, chivalry and of course ultimately… love. After much disillusionment I realized I probably was not going to get that from a guy that I met in a club, BBW or otherwise….
One of my old co-workers recently became engaged. When she called me with the news, I asked how they met.
“Officially, we met on the subway,” she said. Then she lowered her voice, “but between you and me, we met on the Internet!”
This was the third successful relationship I had heard of that started online. Maybe my past experience had scarred me. I hadn’t looked into the Internet in years, maybe it was time for me to revisit. I started with the sites whose commercial theme songs I knew by heart, but after weeks I had little to no response.
Then I began to do some research, ha! I should have known that there were sites specifically for plus size princesses. I found an online community where you could register to be on sites based on things like religion, race and body type preferences.
I began talking to a banker named Matthew who worked on wall street, we had been talking via phone and Instant Messenger for the past week. One night Paige was over and as she checked her email on my computer I heard the chime of an IM come in (I had forgotten to log off).
“‘BKBANKER’, hmmm I know that name,” Paige said.
EEK! Paige was getting a glimpse into my new dating world and I didn’t like it. “That’s a friend of mine,” I said “I don’t think you know him…”
“I do,” Paige said. “Is his real name Matt?”
How did she know?
She saw the look on my face and laughed, “CeCe are you on an online dating site?” I had no choice but to confess. As it turned out, Paige was on the same site and, according to her, so were many of the other BBW’s from DIVAS.
“I used to talk to Matt. You shouldn’t bother with him– all he wants is sex.”
Augh! Here I thought I had found a loop-hole, a way to get out of The Scene and still find guys who were interested in a plus size princess. Somehow, I ended up walking right into the online version of the scene I was trying to avoid.
I wasn’t going to loose hope completely, I still had an inbox full of messages, hopefully from men Paige had never spoken to….